Venting.

[Master Lucien Kane]

I am so mad right now and the worst thing is, I can't talk about it here, because it would offend some people here.  Argh!

Shoot me a PM if you want to vent.

[Darth_Arkanus]

my mother in law was the same way. After my father in law passed away from cancer she became severely depressed and she wouldn't go to the doctor for anything. She eventually got a infection in her intestine and just went down hill from there and she still wouldn't go see a doctor. No matter how much my wife begged her she still wouldn't go. Later on she went and the doctor told her she needed surgery to remove part of the intestine which was actually rotting  . About a month the later she passed away from sepsis. Long story short, I believe that she knew it was her time and she knew that she was at the point of no return. I'm not saying that your dad was at that point because I don't know the severity of his illness but sometimes people just know when to say when. I think if my mother in law went to see a doctor two or three months before she passed she'd still be here today.  So try not be angered by your dads decision not to do his treatments only because he may have had his reasons not to do them.

I see what you are saying, but his "decision" was totally unnecessary and cruel to my mother, and has left us both in such a financial hole that we may NEVER get out of it. (The "help" that's available is far less that people say; when you start to look at it)

So I'm dealing on several levels;

emotionally - for what it's doing to me and what I'm seeing it doing to mum
financially - cos we may lose EVERYTHING and we still have to cremate the guy

I'm so wound up that even my nervous blood heat problem has returned. (The Doctors have never been able to diagnose it, cos' it feels like my blood is boiling in my veins and its very painful)

[Darth Abaddon]

Being retaliated against is fun... 

Well the other night one of the managers told a girl that is 9 months pregnant to go do garbage. Well when you
are pregnant you aren't supposed to lift more than like 15 lbs.
The garbage bags can weigh up to 80lbs depending where you get it.
I took it upon myself to confront the manager about it. He confirmed that he told her to do it and said he told her if any of them were too heavy to leave them.
I told him that 1. that's a waste of time cause then he has to send someone else out to hunt for them and 2. you can't tell how heavy they are until you lift them. (I used to be a garbage man and have thrown my back out several times from that)
I told him that I'm watching out for her, the baby and even him in the long run because if something happens to the kid, she's gonna sue the hell out of him and it's considered a living child here so he'd likely be looking at involuntary manslaughter charges.
I told him she isn't doing the garbage and that I am.
He thanked me blah blah
He then yelled at her saying if she had a problem to go see him herself. She didn't know I talked to him until I told her she wasn't doing garbage and I made him aware of it.
So the next night he apologized to her and was super nice to her but was a complete jerk to me. He told me I needed to go do garbage immediately. It was pouring rain outside. Outside garbage takes almost an hour. Luckily for me the rain stopped. He had me clean his office, climb under the registers to clean out this brownish yellow gunk that was built up for years and had me reaching under all the aisles to get all the stuff out of them. Basically he took me off my routine just to punish me.

If it was a one night thing, and after my weekend is over it's done, that will be the end of it. If it continues Saturday night, the store manager WILL hear about it. If he does nothing I will be going to the market affairs or whatever it is. And if they don't do anything about it, I'll be going corporate. I will also be having my phone voice record every time I talk to him from now on. 

From what I understand he has a history of power tripping. And I don't even like her very much, honestly she annoys me to no end most days. But wrong is wrong. And she gave me the most sincere "thank you" I think I've ever heard which made the punishment worth it.   

I guess bottom line is, managers need to realize that if you treat those below you with respect then they will want to work more. If you treat them like trash, how can you expect them to break their backs for you?

[B1ondeange1]

Being retaliated against is fun... 

Well the other night one of the managers told a girl that is 9 months pregnant to go do garbage. Well when you
are pregnant you aren't supposed to lift more than like 15 lbs.
The garbage bags can weigh up to 80lbs depending where you get it.
I took it upon myself to confront the manager about it. He confirmed that he told her to do it and said he told her if any of them were too heavy to leave them.
I told him that 1. that's a waste of time cause then he has to send someone else out to hunt for them and 2. you can't tell how heavy they are until you lift them. (I used to be a garbage man and have thrown my back out several times from that)
I told him that I'm watching out for her, the baby and even him in the long run because if something happens to the kid, she's gonna sue the hell out of him and it's considered a living child here so he'd likely be looking at involuntary manslaughter charges.
I told him she isn't doing the garbage and that I am.
He thanked me blah blah
He then yelled at her saying if she had a problem to go see him herself. She didn't know I talked to him until I told her she wasn't doing garbage and I made him aware of it.
So the next night he apologized to her and was super nice to her but was a complete jerk to me. He told me I needed to go do garbage immediately. It was pouring rain outside. Outside garbage takes almost an hour. Luckily for me the rain stopped. He had me clean his office, climb under the registers to clean out this brownish yellow gunk that was built up for years and had me reaching under all the aisles to get all the stuff out of them. Basically he took me off my routine just to punish me.

If it was a one night thing, and after my weekend is over it's done, that will be the end of it. If it continues Saturday night, the store manager WILL hear about it. If he does nothing I will be going to the market affairs or whatever it is. And if they don't do anything about it, I'll be going corporate. I will also be having my phone voice record every time I talk to him from now on. 

From what I understand he has a history of power tripping. And I don't even like her very much, honestly she annoys me to no end most days. But wrong is wrong. And she gave me the most sincere "thank you" I think I've ever heard which made the punishment worth it.   

I guess bottom line is, managers need to realize that if you treat those below you with respect then they will want to work more. If you treat them like trash, how can you expect them to break their backs for you?

ive already said my opinions on this matter, so I wont say anymore than this...

definitely agree with your last comment. ive had so many managers go on about how we need to do certain things, bout how we should go out of our way- but they wont do what they say in practice, and the way they treat us they don't give us any reason to want to go out of our way to help them. and then if you do do what they want, they manage to just tell you off some more.
please, if you are a manager somewhere, treat the people under you with respect, whether you like them or not. try and realise things from their point of view, don't just go ape at them before you've checked reality- if we are still doing things wrong then fine, politely tell us so we can fix our mistakes as we may not even realise we are making them, don't berate us and then not let us know how its meant to be done. and don't say one thing and do another. it annoys us underlings no end

[ed_ification]

I'm unsure of the laws in the UK, but I believe that you should inform him that you'll be recording your conversation...

[Kresnik]

I hate working from 0800 to 2200 then coming home and falling asleep to exhaustion at 2330 and then waking up at 0300 just to sit and agonize and STRESS out about work when I  can wake up at 6 ...

We have basically cut back so much and I am salary and I am basically doing the work of 3 people and the rest of the remaining employees are doing the job of 2 or 3 people each...

I am grateful to have a job but its affecting my health, my family every thing.

I have been there for 8 years...

I am patiently hoping waiting that my wife gets a job with her newly obtained RN license so that I can step away and do something I finally want to do with my life and persue Photography as a full time job... Its something I am good at and I enjoy.  Blah

That just adds to the stress...

[eerockk]

Padawan conjunctivitis SUUUUUUUUUCKS!!! 

[Darth Abaddon]

I'm unsure of the laws in the UK, but I believe that you should inform him that you'll be recording your conversation...

I don't live in the UK. I read up on the legality and it's saying that as long as it's in a public area (on the sales floor, with the office door open, basically anywhere that someone passing by could potentially listen in) then it isn't a private conversation and he can legally expect no privacy. Especially in Pennsylvania.

[Master Rel]

I don't live in the UK. I read up on the legality and it's saying that as long as it's in a public area (on the sales floor, with the office door open, basically anywhere that someone passing by could potentially listen in) then it isn't a private conversation and he can legally expect no privacy. Especially in Pennsylvania.

Retaliation is grounds for dismissal.

I would get in touch with the HR and let them know you are seeking legal council in regards to unsafe and hostile work environment.

"what do you mean"

Mention the pregnant girl, 9 months, garbage, excessive specific tasks never done before immediately after, etc.

Start looking for another job.  Easier to get one if you have one already.  I am betting you want to leave anyway   

Work both if you can until resolved.

[Darth Abaddon]

Rel, I don't want to leave. I like just about everyone there and it's one of the higher paying jobs that I can do while in school. Leaving isn't an option. I like the job, just that specific manager is one of many four letter words that I shall not say. 

I will take care of it. I just kinda wanted to piss and moan about it for a bit.

[Master Rel]

Ahhhhh IC !

[Sin Obsidian]

That sucks Darth Abaddon. I always made it a point (and still do to this day) that if I'm in a leadership position (training, supervisor, manager, etc) that I'm right there next to the "boots on the ground" people and generally working harder! Mainly because I work my way up the chain and earn those positions. When I was working the retail / gas station / convenience store jobs while in school we had a saying "You can always tell the who were the higher ups that were hired into the position, and who paid their dues to get there". Sorry you gotta deal with the former.

[Master Rel]

Taking my wife in for surgery today.  We lost our baby.  The doctor told us it died about 1 week ago.  If another person tells me to look on the bright side, I swear I am going to punch them so hard that my excessive punches called during tournaments will look like a pillow fight. 

Thanks to giving me a place to vent. 

Blue

Lost my first child due miscarriage in month 7.

There is nothing to say that will ever make it better.  Time will heal the scars, but the scars remain.

Staying as strong as possible but remaining empathetic is the real trick...finding a balance, staying centered, and being there for your wife...these are things that have value and are worth striving for.

An internet hug is the best I can offer.

Hug

Sorry for you and your wife, life can be a real SOB sometimes. 

[Master Lucien Kane]

Yeah I'm sorry about that, my wife and I have lost several children. It's so tough, the first one it took like three days for my wife to finally get mad enough to ask me if I even cared that we lost a child. It was tough to explain my feelings on the subject, and how I was coping.

I am sorry for your loss, I hope that healing comes quickly.

[Darth Kitsune]

Broke up with my potential girlfriend today. I feel awful because of it. It was sort of both of our faults. I was loosing patience for something and she wasn't moving forward from something, so I was kind of stuck standing still in the relationship and couldn't go anywhere with it.

After a while it kind of put distance between us, and eventually I just couldn't keep standing still. I have a life to live, places to go, people to see. I felt like I was being held back.

So I broke it off. Of course, as I tell her she was went into shock and told me that she was going to tell me that she solved the problem but of course it was too late by now.

But knowing I broke somebody's heart destroys me on the inside. I was always the one getting hurt when I was younger, but this time around I had to put an end to something that just wasn't working. And either way, I still feel awful.

Especially now because I'm afraid of how she will react. I'm not a bad guy, and most everyone will tell you that. I even let her down respectfully. However, I fear that I may become the enemy now, or that people will view me differently. And I'm afraid, knowing her, she will overreact in the worst ways. I kind of helped pull her out of a rut, and she might fall back into it. Not drugs or anything, but she's a danger to herself.

So....yeah.