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Author Topic: Random Thoughts of Members (anything goes...well with in forum rules)  (Read 1823983 times)
Darth Silenoz
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« Reply #47190 on: July 11, 2018, 02:12:31 PM »

Possibly the greatest description of baseball I've ever read.

Agreed.
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Dauntless Seven
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« Reply #47191 on: July 11, 2018, 03:13:22 PM »

Possibly the greatest description of baseball I've ever read.


 Thanks Brooke... I knew that you would totally get it but I just did my last edit to further explain to those less aware and in need of some baseball clarity.  Grin

Thanks Darth Silenoz... some realities regretfully must be brought out into the light.  Wink
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Taegin Roan
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« Reply #47192 on: July 11, 2018, 10:59:54 AM »


Men with really tight pants or leggings use a wooden carved pole to try to hit a small hard ball out of the ballpark.  Extra points for making contact with a spectator who has paid a king's ransom to sit on a hard bleacher seat in the gladiator like stadium while eating overpriced stale hot dogs, popcorn, roasted peanuts and stale warm beer.  They all want to avoid the kissing camera or seeing themselves pop up on the large screens... especially if stuffing their face, picking their nose or having a snooze.  Let's not go there with the hey you called in sick and who's that woman/man sitting too closely beside you ?!

Once the ball has been connected with and goes flying in some approved direction... these men or women then have to sprint to one of 3 bases prior to returning to the home base in a non-random order without being tagged as out.  This counts as 1 score for their team over perhaps 9 innings where each team takes their turn.  In other words someone who actually shows up to see the marathon game live and can pay the criminal parking fee on top of the rest... will be feeling exhausted and sick from the overall abuse that they willingly put themselves in.  They may not find their car or get out of the parking area to a moving vehicle highway or street until midnight or the next day.

The players get paid an unbelievable amount of money for this special skill... but the trade off is that they develop these crazy ticks that can be called a form of communication, find some kind of religious deity to send their prayers of good fortune to, usually chew and spit black snuff very close to where they sit and stand in an area called the dug out  ( from what ?! ) and must allow their rear end to get patted on by other members of the team and questionable friendlies. Oh and they must be able to catch the ball with a leather glove that is not as padded as one would assume and then throw the ball back at a similar speed and distance that the wooden stick or bat sent it out.  It helps if you are from Cuba... perhaps something special in the water.

Done  Grin

Haha, that was awesome. As soon as I read "Men with really tight pants or leggings", I knew that it would be hilarious.
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Infinit01
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« Reply #47193 on: July 11, 2018, 11:02:46 AM »


Men with really tight pants or leggings use a wooden carved pole to try to hit a small hard ball out of the ballpark.  Extra points for making contact with a spectator who has paid a king's ransom to sit on a hard bleacher seat in the gladiator like stadium while eating overpriced stale hot dogs, popcorn, roasted peanuts and stale warm beer.  They all want to avoid the kissing camera or seeing themselves pop up on the large screens... especially if stuffing their face, picking their nose or having a snooze.  Let's not go there with the hey you called in sick and who's that woman/man sitting too closely beside you ?!

Once the ball has been connected with and goes flying in some approved direction... these men or women then have to sprint to one of 3 bases prior to returning to the home base in a non-random order without being tagged as out.  This counts as 1 score for their team over perhaps 9 innings where each team takes their turn.  In other words someone who actually shows up to see the marathon game live and can pay the criminal parking fee on top of the rest... will be feeling exhausted and sick from the overall abuse that they willingly put themselves in.  They may not find their car or get out of the parking area to a moving vehicle highway or street until midnight or the next day.

The players get paid an unbelievable amount of money for this special skill... but the trade off is that they develop these crazy ticks that can be called a form of communication, find some kind of religious deity to send their prayers of good fortune to, usually chew and spit black snuff very close to where they sit and stand in an area called the dug out  ( from what ?! ) and must allow their rear end to get patted on by other members of the team and questionable friendlies. Oh and they must be able to catch the ball with a leather glove that is not as padded as one would assume and then throw the ball back at a similar speed and distance that the wooden stick or bat sent it out.  It helps if you are from Cuba... perhaps something special in the water.

Done  Grin

I read this is Robin Williams voice since it reminded me of his Scottish rendition of explaining golf. Point for you
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ThreadJack
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« Reply #47194 on: July 11, 2018, 11:12:57 AM »


 Thanks Brooke... I knew that you would totally get it but I just did my last edit to further explain to those less aware and in need of some baseball clarity.  Grin

Thanks Darth Silenoz... some realities regretfully must be brought out into the light.  Wink

I just noticed, you forgot all about the sunflower seeds.
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Dauntless Seven
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« Reply #47195 on: July 11, 2018, 06:25:11 PM »

I just noticed, you forgot all about the sunflower seeds.

YIKES !!  How could I have forgotten about Spits... actually I didn't know that they sold them there but why not since everything else is being dumped on to the persons sitting one row down in front of you lol.  Tongue
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ThreadJack
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« Reply #47196 on: July 11, 2018, 11:44:42 AM »

YIKES !!  How could I have forgotten about Spits... actually I didn't know that they sold them there but why not since everything else is being dumped on to the persons sitting one row down in front of you lol.  Tongue

There's usually a whole bucket of them in the dugout.
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Dauntless Seven
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« Reply #47197 on: July 11, 2018, 12:22:38 PM »

Convinced me... back to edit number  ??... but are there spittoons in the dug out ?!
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ThreadJack
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« Reply #47198 on: July 11, 2018, 02:35:32 PM »

 
Convinced me... back to edit number  ??... but are there spittoons in the dug out ?!

No. they spit them right on the ground.  Undecided
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Master Seblaise
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« Reply #47199 on: July 11, 2018, 10:14:41 PM »


 Great !  I can't wait to give you my astute summary of the highlights of this game... based entirely on skewed 2nd hand information and... is this a soccer match because those gorgeous streamlined guys run like deers or antelopes.  This is a game I possibly could watch... just cuz.  Hopefully the rules of engagement don't get in the way.  Oh yeah... and the half time show is really good... if Shakira is somehow involved as her " hips don't lie ".  Wink Tongue  


I really can wait to read that Cheesy
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Darth Silenoz
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« Reply #47200 on: July 11, 2018, 11:20:16 PM »

I'm all for an entire thread titled "D7 explains the sport ball games".
I could read a description of pretty much any and all sports written in this fashion. Brilliant. Smiley
 
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« Reply #47201 on: July 12, 2018, 07:38:36 AM »

I read this is Robin Williams voice since it reminded me of his Scottish rendition of explaining golf. Point for you
Is there a YouTube video of this? I must see it.
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« Reply #47202 on: July 12, 2018, 01:06:33 AM »

I'm thinking France will win, but I have been wrong on a couple games already.
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Master Seblaise
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« Reply #47203 on: July 12, 2018, 02:22:51 PM »

I'm thinking France will win, but I have been wrong on a couple games already.

You are not allowed to be wrong on that Cheesy
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Darth Tepes
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« Reply #47204 on: July 12, 2018, 03:14:01 PM »

Is there a YouTube video of this? I must see it.


Warning: NSFW Language

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pcnFbCCgTo4
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