Interludes

[Lord_S_Gray]

Last One....I'm sure Dutchman will know who this is..

Path to Legacy - Interlude 7

The Apprentice

The heat was stifling, every inch of her was covered in sweat, twin suns mercilessly beat down upon her.  Her breath was ragged and course from her dry throat. Yet she kept going.

The sand was burning hot, it seeped through her boots to her sweat drenched feet, the wind blew the coarse grains into her face.  Yet she kept going.

There seemed to be no end to the course she had been set, no matter how many markers she passed an infinite number stretched to the horizon, and with each one she passed the weight of her pack seemed to grow.  Yet she kept going.

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The cold was biting into each and every nerve, her very bones felt frozen to the core.  The darkness and slick ice floor made it nearly impossible to avoid slipping.  Yet she kept going.

The sleet came down and drenched her hair and skin, pulling out all feeling, her arms and legs were numb, invisible to her senses, spurred on only by her mind that wasn’t even sure they were still attached.  Yet she kept going.

Razor sharps blocks of ice fell from the glacier walls, invisible in the dark to all normal senses, the precipice indistinguishable just two steps ahead from the slippery ice, a centimetre either way and she would be crushed and cut, or fall and splattered.  Yet she kept going.

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The planet felt of death and rot.  It was like a stench, one you couldn’t block out with a mask, one that wasn’t just hitting your sense of smell but your whole body.  The force was rotten here.  Yet she kept going.

The denizens of this place were a reflection of the force, they would spit on her, curse her, push her in crowds, try to grab her in lecherous ways.  Yet she kept going

The way they looked at her was sickening, like she was a dish of some kind to be served at their pleasure, they spoke to her like she was nothing more than a body that occasionally made noises from a pretty little set of lips that should be doing something more pleasurable for them.  Yet she kept going.

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It had been hot and steamy in the cantina, she was tired from chasing the thugs, acidic drinks, knives and blaster bolts were thrown at her, the floor was a mess of blood and rusted metal…but she had caught them – She had kept going

The void of space had been freezing about her, bolts of blue came out of nowhere any one of which would obliterate her small fighter, the planets gravity threatened to pull her into a crushing descent at any second, the freighter was inches from making the jump to hyperspace…but she hit the engines just in time – She had kept going.

No one had listened, or taken her seriously, she had to research it herself, ask around in the seediest of places, proffered bribes of credits and flesh to just let it go, ignore it…but she had exposed them – She had kept going.

[TheDutchman]

I am going to go with "Kiraea."

Once again LSG you prove what an incredible author you are.  Completely different use of voice; you really are quite the poet ( and I don't mean that in the generic way, your prose is reflective of both adversity and (more importantly) the persistence to endure and succeed.  I wish that I could write in different voices as successfully and as easy as you do.  Outstanding writing my friend!

[Karmack]

"Tears"

I sat in lotus in the middle of the training room mat.  The tears had stopped an hour or so before, but the hollow pit in my stomach remained.

Dad is never coming home...

The hollow look in my mother's eyes as the words emerged said more than the flat tone.  The mission had been ... routine.  Surveillance of a mercenary unit dispatched by the Hutts to a nearby system after rumors of a Jedi Sentinel hiding there and resisting their attempts to control the planet had surfaced.  Dad had been upbeat when he left, talked about my upcoming transition from formal schooling to Teidowan status.  I was almost fourteen, and we'd already begun the process informally...

But not now.  Something had happened.  The rumors had been true and the Jedi had been localized.  Dad had moved in to help, tried to get him out... 

And instead of the Jedi dying they had BOTH died!

Anger rippled through me, rising like a burning red tide behind my bloodshot eyes.  I screamed in fury, never moving a muscle but using the force to systematically reduce one of the training room target dummies to very small bits...

"Impressive.  Even angry, your control is amazing..."

I whipped around to see Master Chillum standing in the doorway.  He was chuckling, but his eyes were sorrowful ... and disappointed.  "What do you care?   What does it matter?"

Hazel eyes bored into my own.  "It matters.  If I am going to trust my Teidowan with my life I need to know how skilled he is ... and where his focus lies."

Fear rose, replacing anger and a cold fist squeezed my chest.  "I ....   I don't know what you mean, Master."

Again the sad, disappointed look.  "Honesty, Karm.  Always honesty."

I felt defiance rise.  Crest.  Break and fall away.   I tore my eyes away and looked at the room around me.  It was littered with debris from my temper tantrum...  I looked back at Master Chillum, and the anger melted away, replaced by sorrow ... and shame.  My eyes filled with tears and I broke down sobbing again.  "I'm so...so....sorry..."

Arms enveloped me.  "Now, now lad.   Cry...."

We sat there for a long time, Master Chillum rocking me as I cried more than I thought I could.  Finally it was done and I sat back.  "Thank you, Uncle Du'an..."

He sat across from me, adopting a lotus.  His eyes told me that the time of comforting was over.  Now for 'the talk'... "You're welcome.  Now...  Tell me about the rage."

The cold fist in the pit of my stomach returned.  "Rage, master?"  The eyes narrowed and I swallowed.  There was no point in trying to lie or hide it.  I'd felt it growing all day, a glowing ball of magma, deep down, feeding the anger, the tantrum, the sorrow, the grief...  "It's there, Master.  I feel it.  Rage.  Rage against those who killed father.  Rage against..."  I swallowed.  Shame flamed my cheeks. 

"Honesty, lad.  Always."  Master Chillum repeated, his voice soft.  His eyes were softened by understanding, but the unyielding mettel remeained.   

I nodded.  "Yes sir.  I feel rage against the Kage, and the Council, for sending Dad.  And I feel rage that .... that I wasn't there with him."  I took a deep breath and suddenly it blazed in my chest and my eyes.  "I hate them all!"

Master Chillum's expression never changed.  His face was still, dispassionate.  His body quiet, at rest.  And his eyes....   Rock hard but also soft.  Determined and loving.  Sorrowful ... and disappointed.  I felt the hatred burning bright inside me, fueling the rage, fueling the anger, and I knew that was what disappointed him.  Not that I was angry.  Anger was normal, a part of grief.

Uncle Du'an is disappointed in me for hating....

The realization rocked through me.  The Mak'Tor did not reject strong emotions or emotional ties as the Jedi did, but they did reject Evil.  And hate was Evil.  Anger was not Hatred.  Anger could be fueled by a desire to bring justice or stop and injustice.  Anger, under control, could even save your life.  But anger fueled by hatred...  Hate only destroyed.  Anger was a flame, a fire, that could be controlled.  Hatred was a pit of magma that could only control you, use you, and burn you to a cinder.

And I ... hated.

I hated!

A sense of fear and desperation flooded through me.  I had a sense of my potential.  Father and I had discussed it many times.  The evidence of it was all around me, in the debris I had created in my rage.  In my hatred!  I looked around the room and saw the damage, saw it for what it was: evidence of my failure.  My unfitness to be called a Knight.  Or Teidowan.

I turned eyes filled with desperation and despair on my uncle.  My mouth opened and closed.  No words would come.

Master Chillum leaned forward, took my head in his hands and locked my eyes to his.  "There's only one way out, Karm.  Only one.  You must forgive."

Forgive...

My voice was a whisper.  "Forgive?  Who?"

"Everyone.  All of us that have injured you.  Just as the Maker forgives us when we hurt him.  Vengence belongs to Him, lad.  Let Him to His job.  Forgive ... and live."

I trembled.  There as suddenly a war raging in my chest, and I couldn't breathe.  Forgive?  NO!  I wanted to HATE them!  To rip them to shreds.   To kill them all....   But then i recoiled away from the hatred.  No!  Kill them all?  Kill the Kage?  Master Chillum?  Mom?  I felt myself teatering on a knife-edge...

Forgive ... and live...

Suddenly it was clear.  Life or Death.  Love or Hate.  Live or Die.  I opened my eyes and in that moment I chose to live.  Maker, forgive me!  I forgive you!  Help me forgive!

"Uncle Du'an ... I forgive you."

The tears started again, and I saw them in Master Chillum's face as well.  "Aye, Lad.  Thank you..."  And his arms were around me again.  When we parted this time, his eyes were shining, the disappointment gone.  "And now, lad, lets get this place cleaned up."

I smiled and wiped my eyes, rising to join my new Master in cleaning up the mess I'd made.  I poked carefully at my emotions.  There would be more tears.  The sorrow was still there, dark and forboding.  And the anger.  But the hatred was gone.

I would live.

[Taegin Roan]

So good. I love how easy it is for you to write a story (or three) about a grown man, but then every once and a while you just decide to switch to a young boy. And keeping the young boy and the grown man the same person, even though there is an age and understanding difference, it is amazing to see. TD and LSG are both great writers, and I love their work, but I feel that yours is somehow different. Better almost in some ways.

Anyways, great job once again, so glad you are doing these interludes that give us a bit of a look into Karmack's past.

[Karmack]

So good. I love how easy it is for you to write a story (or three) about a grown man, but then every once and a while you just decide to switch to a young boy. And keeping the young boy and the grown man the same person, even though there is an age and understanding difference, it is amazing to see. TD and LSG are both great writers, and I love their work, but I feel that yours is somehow different. Better almost in some ways.

Anyways, great job once again, so glad you are doing these interludes that give us a bit of a look into Karmack's past.

Thanks Taegin!  I don't know if I'd say there's anything better...  Different maybe.  :-)

You'll understand why this is relevant soon.  Its a seriously important part of Karmack's development, though.  The Jedi always seemed to have a problem with anger, fear, rage and hatred because they can easily lead you down a dark path.   Their solution was to cut them off.  And then to cut off any of the myriad of entanglements that might lead to them.  But you can't avoid those entanglements if you're alive.  And so they inevitably lost friends, or faced an injustice that could not be corrected.  Which led them to personal pain, anger, fear, sorrow, hatred, rage...  And into the dark.  Anakin Skywalker, repeated over and over.

The Mak'Tor have a very different philosophy.  One they would say was given to them millenia ago by a direct revelation from the Maker Himself.  Seems to work pretty well.  Not that its easy.  But having a tradition of not embracing vengeance and forgiving your enemies for the hurt they do to you, while also pursuing justice and trying very hard to prevent Evil, represents their ultimate form of balance.

Whew!  Sorry, I didn't mean to wax so philosophical!  Glad you enjoyed the interlude!

[Taegin Roan]

Thanks Taegin!  I don't know if I'd say there's anything better...  Different maybe.  :-)

You'll understand why this is relevant soon.  Its a seriously important part of Karmack's development, though.  The Jedi always seemed to have a problem with anger, fear, rage and hatred because they can easily lead you down a dark path.   Their solution was to cut them off.  And then to cut off any of the myriad of entanglements that might lead to them.  But you can't avoid those entanglements if you're alive.  And so they inevitably lost friends, or faced an injustice that could not be corrected.  Which led them to personal pain, anger, fear, sorrow, hatred, rage...  And into the dark.  Anakin Skywalker, repeated over and over.

The Mak'Tor have a very different philosophy.  One they would say was given to them millenia ago by a direct revelation from the Maker Himself.  Seems to work pretty well.  Not that its easy.  But having a tradition of not embracing vengeance and forgiving your enemies for the hurt they do to you, while also pursuing justice and trying very hard to prevent Evil, represents their ultimate form of balance.

Whew!  Sorry, I didn't mean to wax so philosophical!  Glad you enjoyed the interlude!

No problem. I get a bit philosophical when thinking about these stories on my own. To me, the Mak'Tor's view of the Force makes much more sense to me than that which is portrayed in the movies and tv shows. In the movies all we really know is that midi-chlorians play some role, and that it's energy surrounds us and binds the galaxy together. From what you have written, we see that the reason for this is that there is a "Maker" that controls all, and has a plan for all. That combined with the knowledge from the movies gives us an understanding of what the Force is. It isn't "mystical", it is more of something "divine". Though from the limited view of the Jedi, it could seem as something mystical.

Good stuff, can't wait to see how this all ties in to coming chapters.

[Karmack]

No problem. I get a bit philosophical when thinking about these stories on my own. To me, the Mak'Tor's view of the Force makes much more sense to me than that which is portrayed in the movies and tv shows. In the movies all we really know is that midi-chlorians play some role, and that it's energy surrounds us and binds the galaxy together. From what you have written, we see that the reason for this is that there is a "Maker" that controls all, and has a plan for all. That combined with the knowledge from the movies gives us an understanding of what the Force is. It isn't "mystical", it is more of something "divine". Though from the limited view of the Jedi, it could seem as something mystical.

Good stuff, can't wait to see how this all ties in to coming chapters.

Thanks.  That's the view I am hoping to express.  Just don't tell the Jedi, they might decide I am a heretic and come after me...  LOL

[Lord_S_Gray]

I am going to go with "Kiraea."

Once again LSG you prove what an incredible author you are.  Completely different use of voice; you really are quite the poet ( and I don't mean that in the generic way, your prose is reflective of both adversity and (more importantly) the persistence to endure and succeed.  I wish that I could write in different voices as successfully and as easy as you do.  Outstanding writing my friend!

Not quite, the girl you thought Kiraea's story would be about, and got right with the Master Interlude!

[Lord_S_Gray]

".  No!  Kill them all?  Kill the Kage?  Master Chillum?  Mom?  I felt myself teatering on a knife-edge..."

A blunt Sith would say do it!! Enjoy it if it makes you feel good.
A smarter Sith would bury that hatred deep down and wait for the right time to unleash that hatred upon them after using everything they have first.
 
An interesting facet of Karmacks personality...will it resurface I wonder...and upon whom...

[Karmack]

".  No!  Kill them all?  Kill the Kage?  Master Chillum?  Mom?  I felt myself teatering on a knife-edge..."

A blunt Sith would say do it!! Enjoy it if it makes you feel good.
A smarter Sith would bury that hatred deep down and wait for the right time to unleash that hatred upon them after using everything they have first.
 
An interesting facet of Karmacks personality...will it resurface I wonder...and upon whom...

I believe we all have the killer inside of us.  We just choose whether or not to release him.  :-)

[TheDutchman]

Outstanding Karm!  I really am interested in Karm's past.  Unfortunately for him, one of his "Trial by Fire" moments happens at a young age (I can empathize).  But I also know that such adversity can produce a stronger foundation in people...especially with a support system. Master Chillum is always a pleasure to read about and here is no different.  But it does give insight into their relationship.

TR is right: you're an amazing writer my friend!  To wit: you inspired (and speaking for myself, continue to do so for) us to begin this incredible experience!  Even better: our shared "experiment" of continuity continues to enrich this universe 

Superb installment Karm!

[Karmack]

Thanks.  I love the interludes.  Its a great place to explore...

One of the key concepts of life is that of love and hate.  Most of us use these words very lightly, and few of us ever even bother to find out what they mean.

One key to my "Gray" concept is that the Mak'Tor do not hate people.  But they do hate evil.  Or perhaps a better way to say it is they have a passionate, intense dislike for wickedness.  But then you have to get into what "wickedness" is...    I'm sure Karmack and Valens wouldn't necessarily agree on how to define "wicked".

And that would be the rub. 

[Lord_S_Gray]

Thanks.  I love the interludes.  Its a great place to explore...

One of the key concepts of life is that of love and hate.  Most of us use these words very lightly, and few of us ever even bother to find out what they mean.

One key to my "Gray" concept is that the Mak'Tor do not hate people.  But they do hate evil.  Or perhaps a better way to say it is they have a passionate, intense dislike for wickedness.  But then you have to get into what "wickedness" is...    I'm sure Karmack and Valens wouldn't necessarily agree on how to define "wicked".

And that would be the rub. 

Valens wouldn't waste his time defining wickedness...to him it would be aimless pontificating...either you're helping his people or you are not...and if you're not...would be interesting to see how Karmack would react to someone with absolutely no interest in defining the galaxy into good or evil.

The problem with hating evil is that what is evil differs by time, place , culture, situation and point of view...its malleable...but that very variety provides lots of fodder for Mak'Tor story lines...it would be fascinating to see two Mak'tor interpreting the same ambiguous event is completely different ways for example.

[Karmack]

Valens wouldn't waste his time defining wickedness...to him it would be aimless pontificating...either you're helping his people or you are not...and if you're not...would be interesting to see how Karmack would react to someone with absolutely no interest in defining the galaxy into good or evil.

The problem with hating evil is that what is evil differs by time, place , culture, situation and point of view...its malleable...but that very variety provides lots of fodder for Mak'Tor story lines...it would be fascinating to see two Mak'tor interpreting the same ambiguous event is completely different ways for example.

That's a good point.  I haven't revealed this yet in story, but the Mak'Tor have a holy text, the "Book of the Way", extremely ancient and they view it the way a Christian would view the Bible or a Karite Jew views the Torah and Talmud - the inspired, infallible Word of God, or in Mak'Tor terms - the Way of the Singer.  As you can imagine, singing is intregal to their worship.  :-)

But what do you do when something treads into the "gray" area....  You'd think Gray Jedi would be all about that.  LOL

Might have to explore that...  I wonder if Karmack and Zearic agree on what constitutes "Evil"....  Or how Zearic might react to finding out Julwynn (Hri) Kohl is on M'Tzigon under Mak'Tor protection... 

Hmm....

[Karmack]

Interlude: Awakening...   (Follows the story "Wind Chimes")

The last plug was in place and I began the download.  All of the bench tests passed, and everything looked right, but there was always a chance of data transmission error...
The upload completed and the boot computer beeped:  [UPLOAD COMPLETE.  PRESS TO INITIATE REBOOT AND RESTART]

I tapped the screen and there was a hum, then the screen went blank.  Control had been transferred to the on-board logic matrix.

For a long space of time, nothing happened.  Just long enough for me to wonder what went wrong, to reach for a diagnostic computer padd...

Powerup!   The hum was unmistakable.  The astromech's systems came online one by one, servos whining and actuators humming as each system came up and went through its initial boot-up routines.  Finally, after a spin of the sensor dome, everything stopped and a series of tell-tales on the still-connected boot computer went from amber to green. 

The droid was online...  "Two?"

The dome turned, bringing the droid's "eye" around to look at me.  There was no other movement or sound.

"Two, you OK?  System checks look good..."

Finally there was a sound.  Two tweeted a series of high-pitched twills, followed by a rude-sounding string of low-pitched beeps and bops.  Two was back!  Yes, its a new body!  Sorry, the old one was kind of unavailable."

Two twittered back then stopped as I slid a file to him.  I hadn't wanted it in the original upload, since it could  be a shock to have imagry of your own dead body already in your memory when you woke up.  Two scanned the file, letting out nothing but a low whistle as he looked it over.

"So, no.  I couldn't salvage anything.  Sorry.  Besides, there's a few things in this one you may like.  Check out the internal schematic."

Two clicked and whirred as his active memory, what we would think of as his 'awareness', scanned his internal schematic files and status reports.  With a happy whistle he suddenly popped out the small jets we'd built back in, restoring his flight capabilities lost on Coruscant, but that outburst was nothing compared to the sudden hooting that erupted next.  Rocking on his legs with sudden joy Two popped open a new compartment and extended a song-steel manipulator arm.  The snap-hiss that followed was unmistakable...

Two held a lightsaber, ignited and shining a feint, pale blue.  Excitedly he swung it around, twittering in rapid sequence.

"No, Two, this does NOT mean you are a Knight!  No, you cannot participate in the Knighting ceremony!  Yes, you can keep it!  No, I am NOT going to build a larger version for your DCC!"  I laughed as Two closed down the saber and stowed the arm, heading out of the cybernetics lab toward the Wayfarer and his companions to display his new body part.  I watched him go, then thought back to what I'd just seen.

Blue?  I could have sworn that was  a pure silver kyber crystal...