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Author Topic: Untouchable  (Read 1588 times)
Zyn
Knight Templar
*

Force Alignment: 62
Posts: 335


What do I see? Light... Darkness.... Balance


« on: August 02, 2018, 11:28:04 AM »

Man, it's been a while since I've been on these forums. Change of jobs and a new kid really take up the time, but now that I have a bit, I've decided to get back to my writing and play a bit with a story I cooked up a little while ago. Thanks go out to Karmack, Dutch, and Taegin Roan for their stories and the inspiration to tell my own.

For a bit of a background, this story takes place during the Clone Wars, not long before Order 66 was carried out. It follows a failed Jedi Padawan, who spurned the Order after being offered what he felt was an inferior assignment in the Jedi Service Corps. On his own, he does what he can to survive and live a life as removed as possible from everything to do with the Jedi and the War.

A standard bit of practice here, this story and characters are fictitious, mine, and not subject to use without my permission. It is also not finished, nor edited and subject to change as I still think of arcs and directions to take this new monstrosity. I also reserve the right to post my stories with ridiculous typos, misspellings, and non cannon Star Wars material because I am not an expert on any of it and do not claim to be. I will update the story with new chapters as often as I can, but please bear with me if long gaps develop.

And so, without any more ado, I present to the Saber Forums, Untouchable.

_____________________________________________________________________

Prologue

“This is your final warning,” Zyn told the three gangsters standing in front of him in a back alley on Coruscant. “Pay what you owe, or I will take it from your flesh.”

Laughs echoed off of the high walls as the three Falleen began to spread themselves out and reach for their belts. They were muttering to themselves in whatever guttural language was their mother tongue, one he didn’t even begin to understand. He felt his anger rising along with his heart rate. The thunder of each beat further fueling his rage and causing his hands to tremble.

“Look at him shake with fear,” the one named Turr chuckled in Basic.

“If you’re threatening us, you’ll find more trouble than you can handle,” the leader, Zuul, said defiantly.

The three of them squared up to him, palming the grips of the blasters hanging from their belts. Taking a calming breath, he closed his eyes to focus his thoughts on what he must do, something his former master had taught him. The rage was quelled for a moment, but quickly returned when Zuul spoke again.

“We’ll pay you nothing!” Several seconds of silence followed before Zyn opened his eyes to respond.

“So be it.”

In a flash, Zyn discarded his black cloak into a heap on the ground behind him while pulling his weapon from his belt. The deep orange blade screamed to life, leaving his targets stunned in awe. It was likely they had never seen a lightsaber before, but even the lowest of the low knew not just anyone carried such weapons.

“A Jedi!?” Jumni balked. “Since when do Jedi bet on the races?”

Zyn kept silent as he marched toward them, his saber held down at his side. The hum it gave off was a welcome sound to its owner, calming him yet doing nothing to quench his anger. Twenty thousand credits would be his before he left this alley. One way or another.

The fools on his flanks drew their weapons simultaneously. Jumni’s weapon was shaking with uncertainy while Turr’s was as steady as a rock and aimed directly at the human’s chest. A slight smirk emerged on Zyn’s face as the irony of his training hadn’t been lost on him. He disliked Soresu, despised it, in fact, for its utter lack of offensive capability. Despite his disdain, however, he had found it the easiest of his forms to master.

In the blink of an eye, a blaster bolt from Turr was parried and sent in to the chest of Jumni, dropping the weakest of the group to the ground. Spinning the blade effortlessly in front of him, Zyn used his momentum to slice through Turr’s weapon in one swipe and remove his head with another. As he turned to face Zuul, he noticed the leader of the troupe had his large green hands raised in surrender.

“Okay, okay!” Zuul cried in fear. “I will pay.”

Zuul slowly lowered his right hand to his belt, unsnapping a worn leather pouch and reaching inside. After rummaging around inside of it and not taking his eyes off the lightsaber pointed only inches from his face, his hand came up with four credit chips, offering them up slowly to his adversary.

“Twenty thousand, right?” Zuul asked. His voice was full of fear, which Zyn knew he could exploit for more.

“I want another ten for making me come down here to collect it.”

The Falleen’s mouth dropped open at the order. Who was this human to make such demand? Thirty thousand credits would set Zuul back months. If he could somehow get the lightsaber from the Jedi’s grasp, he knew he could easily crush this human’s puny skull, or perhaps remove it whole. It would make a fine trophy to display should anyone else should come looking to collect on him.

“Fine, fine,” Zuul said, the shimmering blade reflecting in his dark eyes. “Ten thousand more. Whatever you want, but only if you lower that thing.”

Squaring himself to his adversary, Zyn slowly lowered the orange stream of energy emanating from his weapon, but didn’t trust Zuul enough to completely extinguish it. The electric hum continued to echo up and down the alleyway, but he did not fear anyone hearing it. The Force was telling him no else was around.

“Here,” Zuul offered, shaking the original set of credit chips. “Take it and I’ll get you the rest.”

As Zyn reached for his prize, a nagging feeling in his head told him something wasn’t right. He did his best to reach out with the Force, but given his limited time in the Jedi Order, he wasn’t able to pinpoint exactly what the feeling meant. It only served to distract him from the rush of the Falleen criminal in front of him.

Before he could react, a thick green fist collided with his jaw and sent him reeling. Dropping the lightsaber, the blade extinguished itself as both it and its master fell to the ground. Zyn’s head swam with daze as he did his best to bring himself back into the moment, but failing as Zuul’s thick fingers closed around his throat.

“You are no Jedi,” Zuul laughed as he pulled Zyn to his feet and pinned him against a wall. The silver glint of steel appeared in Zuul’s right hand, which Zyn recognized in his unsteady consciousness as a vibroblade.

Calming himself, Zyn reached out with the Force for his lightsaber. He’d never been one to master the telekinetic abilities of his peers. At most, he’d been able to dump over a cup he was attempting to lift, earning a smack on the head from his mentor. Instead, all of his Force techniques had been focused on combat, which he long ago learned was useless without a weapon in his hand.

In his mind, he pictured his lightsaber sailing from the pavement and into his hand. Remembering the lessons he’d failed to learn under his master caused his anger to rise once again. His wish became an order, a command of the Force to submit to his will and deliver his salvation.  As the hum of the vibroblade closed in on his throat, Zyn felt the hatred coming to a boil in his chest just as the cold metal of his lightsaber hilt hit his palm.

In the blink of an eye, the blade materialized between their faces, and with a flick of the wrist, Zyn severed the arm holding him by the throat. A howl of pain escaped Zuul’s lips as they both fell to the ground, Zyn desperately clawing at the hand still grasping his neck. Getting back to his feet, he saw Zuul reaching for the blade he had dropped.

“Allow me,” Zyn said, shearing the vibroblade's hilt in half with a slash of his own weapon.

Dropping to a knee above his adversary, he positioned the saber’s blade over the Falleen’s throat. Immediately, Zuul froze in fear, a look of panic appearing in his eyes. Basking in the glory of his victory, an inadvertent smirk emerged on Zyn’s face as he contemplated finishing off the criminal.

“Wait!” Zuul pleaded, as if reading his mind. “I can get you more! Whatever you want, it’s yours!”

“Thank you,” Zyn replied, emptying Zuul’s credit pouch with his free hand and getting back to his feet. After extinguishing his blade, he tucked his new fortune into his own belt as Zuul laid there in silence, stunned at what had just happened.

Gathering his cloak from the ground, Zyn began to slowly walk himself back toward the street. Reflection was needed on how to improve his skills so that no enemy ever took advantage of him again. Anger still boiled away inside of him, but he did his best to control it, not only for his own sake, but that of Zuul as well. Before leaving the alley, the crippled gangster began to yell yet another insult.

“You are no Jedi,” Zuul repeated with a cough.

“You’re right, I am no Jedi” Zyn shrugged, donning his cloak and turning his back to the wounded Falleen. “And I never was.”

Logged

"The protectors of the Balance must stand on the edge of two worlds, accepted by neither, masters of both."

Butcher (Diamond) | Emperor's Hand* (BR) | Lost Gray* (SD) | Sentinel v4* (BR) | Reaper (AB) | D. Initiate (AS) | D. Apprentice LE v4 (SY) | Aeon v4 (CG) (WILLING TO TRADE) | Dark Sentinel/Aeon Staff (FO) | D. Prophecy Build Project (Pending)

Lord_S_Gray
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Force Alignment: 75
Posts: 800



« Reply #1 on: August 02, 2018, 08:17:45 AM »

What a great start, always good to see another writer sharing their stories Zyn. Really good prologue sets up the character Zyn really well in terms of disposition - anger bubbling and clearly not averse to a little lightsabre diplomacy, abilities (or lack thereof re telekinesis and preferred forms),  but leaves a lot of back story still to fill in re whatever relationship with the Jedi Zyn had - clearly some aspects of their teachings didn't rub off!  Look forward to reading more.
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Lord_S_Gray

Surik: "Kreia, what are you—are you a Jedi, a Sith?"
Kreia: "Does it matter? Of course it does, such titles allow you to break the galaxy into light and dark, categorize it. Perhaps I am neither, and I hold both as what they are, pieces of a whole."

TheDutchman
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: 701
Posts: 2798


Guardian Blue is my life


« Reply #2 on: August 04, 2018, 11:30:20 AM »

Intriguing beginning, Zyn!  I have to say that within the short narrative that you've given us, I want to read more about the circumstances surrounding your character.  And while some of us have written anti-heroes as protagonists, none have done so under the auspices of being scorned by the Jedi Order.  Wonderful pathos!  And, to echo LSG, I am definitely looking forward to reading more!

...I just hope that you can do so without the long gaps of...








...anticipation  Wink

I am of course just joking Smiley
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Maenowan Nexu Master of the Vhal'Dan

My sabers:Zearic's Aldrnari, Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, AS; Zearic's shoto, Apprentice v4 w/Obsidian, AS; Graflex SE w/Obsidian, GB; Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, CG; Dark Sentinel v4 w/Obsidian, BR; Sentinel LE v4 w/Obsidian, GB; Sentinel LE v4 stunt, EG, Aeon LE v4 stunt, FO

Taegin Roan
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: 1617
Posts: 5242


Lord of the Force


« Reply #3 on: August 05, 2018, 10:50:59 PM »

Wow, very good start. Lots of things to like. Like TD said, the anti-hero vibe we are getting off of Zyn is really cool. My own story is about an Inquisitor, so someone who is not quite on that level of bad is really cool to read about. Plus, you know. . . Orange Lightsaber. Grin

Look forward to reading more, and maybe, possibly, if you enjoy writing, and want to do some experimentation, bringing Zyn into the rest of the SaberForumVerse (Karmack, LSG, TD, TDC and my own stories). Grin
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"I am the Outcast's Shadow" - Taegin Roan
"We are the spark that will light the fire that will burn the first order down." - Poe Dameron

Fifth Knight of the Aeonix Order.

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Karmack
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: 719
Posts: 3318


Light side points please.


« Reply #4 on: August 06, 2018, 06:54:11 AM »

And so it begins...

Zyn, this is an intriguing character.   I don't think we've really delved into what might happen to someone who made it through to padawan level but never advanced.  Trained in the use of the force, able to construct and maintain a lightsaber ... and use it ... but not "fully" trained...

And obviously feeling no obligation to live by the Jedi code.

This will be a very interesting ride! 
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Master Singer of the Mak'Tor

Zyn
Knight Templar
*

Force Alignment: 62
Posts: 335


What do I see? Light... Darkness.... Balance


« Reply #5 on: August 09, 2018, 11:04:45 AM »

I'm going to attempt for a weekly release of chapters on this, but I'm not going to say for sure that's what's going to happen, as work and home life can take over at pretty much any time. This past weekend was a perfect example, but luckily, I had the majority of this chapter written already.

Thank you all for the feedback on the prologue. It always means the most to me when people are interested in my writings and want more. And now, here's chapter one.

______________________________________________________________________________

1.


Sitting in his favorite booth at the local Off World Betting parlor, Zyn watched the numerous monitors displayed at the table in front of him. Each one held images of the racers pitted against each other on whatever nameless world they were racing on. He’d put down a significant sum of credits gained from his exploits concerning the Falleen on several different racers, a practice he often participated in to quite a large success. A cheer from inside the parlor erupted as one of the pods on Zyn’s screen erupted into a fireball after colliding with the mouth of a cave.

“I certainly hope you didn’t bet on that one,” a tall, ivory-skinned Twi’lek in brown robes said with a laugh as she slid herself into the seat across from him.

“A pleasure to see you, as always, Seela,” Zyn nodded in respect. “And I wouldn’t let you put your own money on that one.”

A warm smile greeted him from across the table. Seela Me’s smile had always been beautiful to him, lighting up even his darkest hours. Several potential suitors had crossed Zyn’s path over the years, but none struck his fancy quite as much as Seela had. If their lives weren’t such drastically different, he may have attempted to court her, but such things were not meant for him, it seemed.

“Always so protective,” she laughed, to which a guilty grin emerged on Zyn’s face. “One might think you still have feelings for me.”

“If only I could convince you to leave the Old Folks’ Home for something more suiting of your talents.” An uneasy laugh escaped her lips as she turned her deep orange eyes away from the table to avoid his piercing gaze. “So tell me, how are things with the war?”

“In truth, they could be going better,” she answered, her smile dying. “Our losses are beginning to mount and I’m not sure how much longer we can keep up the fight.”

“Then what are you doing back here? If losses are that bad, don’t they need all the fighters they can get?”

During his time at the academy, the only other student in his class who even came close to matching Zyn’s skill with a lightsaber was Seela. She spent nearly as much time training as he had and could match him blow-for-blow in an open exchange. Where she had the edge, however, was in her use of the Force, which partially explained why she was still a part of the Order and he was not.

“It’s not that simple,” she started, but trailed off as her gaze wandered away from the table again. Clearly, she wasn’t keen on sharing whatever her vagueness was hiding, leading him to the only answer that made sense.

“They haven’t made you a Knight yet,” Zyn finished for her, to which she slammed a closed fist down on the table in frustration.

“I hate it when you do that.” Her gaze narrowed at him, but rather than being intimidated, Zyn found his heart fluttering. “You make me feel like a child when you say things like that.”

“Forgive me,” Zyn withdrew. “I meant no offense. I was only completing the picture for myself.”

Zyn saw a sadness in her eyes he hadn’t seen in a long time. Seela wasn’t one to let her emotions control her, an essential quality in a Jedi. It something Zyn admired and often attempted to emulate. He knew better than to think himself on par with her when it came to self-control, however.

“What are you doing back here?” he asked, attempting to take her mind off the sore subject. “There has to be a reason a Padawan such as yourself is in a lowly place like this and not out there with your master.”

“Master Etain sent me to deliver an update to the Council regarding the events on Kashyyk,” Seela explained. “My transport doesn’t leave until morning, and as it happens, I have a favor to ask of you.”

Zyn’s interest was instantly piqued. Here was Seela, a Jedi Padawan poised to become a Knight any day now, asking a favor she couldn’t, or wouldn’t, ask to her own Order. Instead, she chose to ask an outsider, but not just any outsider. She was asking him, a failed Padawan, meaning this would be a delicate situation the Jedi could not be seen doing.

“What kind of favor?” he asked, giving her his full attention.

“An acquaintance of mine wanted me to ask the Order for personal protection on a trip off world,” she started, but Zyn interrupted with a laugh.

“The Jedi are peacekeepers,” he explained. “Not bodyguards.”

“Which is what I told him, but I offered him the next best thing.”

“A drop out?”

A frown appeared on her otherwise immaculate face. Zyn lived to see her smile, often going out of his way in past to make sure she did. These days, he found very little to smile about outside of his gambling winnings, and it caused his heart to ache seeing Seela as glum as himself.

“Sorry,” he said, shaking his head. “Poor attempt at humor. What makes you think I’d agree to something like this?”

 “For the same reason you still have your lightsaber.”

Smuggling his weapons out the Temple was no easy task, nor was covering his tracks. In fact, he had to enlist Seela herself for help. Zyn had no idea how she did it, but she was able to convince the armorer that a tube of metal and various scrap electronic components sloppily joined together was a working lightsaber. Zyn’s reputation of function over fashion may have helped in the plausibility of the story, but at the end of the day, his lightsaber was reported as destroyed while still in his possession.

“You’re a fighter,” she told him. “You have been all your life, and you secretly live for it.”

Zyn found truth in her words. He could lie all he wanted to others and even himself about wanting to avoid fights, but in his heart, he knew the truth. There was a joy to be had in violence, having tested one’s strength against another and coming out victorious. He’d felt it when he confronted the three Falleen just hours ago. Admittedly, losing a fight could mean losing his life, but to Zyn, where was the fun without danger?

“Being a bodyguard doesn’t mean I’ll see a fight,” he pointed out.

“True,” she admitted. “But if there isn’t one, you get paid for doing nothing, which I also know works for you.” He had to hand it to her: she knew him better than anyone else in the galaxy did.

“What’s the assignment?”

“A Muun banker is making a trip to Kuat to inspect an investment. Apparently, he thinks there will be trouble, but I don’t think it’s anything you can’t handle.”

“How much?”

“He’s offered five hundred thousand credits, with another five hundred thousand once he’s safely back here.”

An inadvertent laugh escaped his lips as he sat back in his seat to mull over what she was actually offering him. One million credits would certainly keep him satisfied for quite some time, but the offer itself didn’t seem believable. That amount to have a faceless nobody babysit some hotshot banker while he toured one of the most highly protected areas of the Republic made no sense at all. There was something deeper to this, but he wasn’t sure if Seela was in on whatever it was, as she wore a scowl until his laughter died down.

“I’m sorry,” he started, hunching forward over the table. “I wasn’t laughing at you, but at the offer. One million credits to watch someone’s back in secured space? What’s the catch?”

“None, so far as I know,” she answered. “Maybe he wants to lure you into some full time work?”

Slowly leaning back once more, Zyn considered his options. He could refuse and continue his life as he always had, on his own and scraping the bottom of the barrel to survive. Admittedly, he was used to it by now, but the thought of finally getting off of Coruscant for good seemed too good to pass on. He wasn’t sure he could accept working for someone full time anymore, but if he wanted to leave at the end of this job, no one could force him to stay.

“You owe me,” Seela blurted out after a long silence. “And not just for the lightsaber.”

As usual, she was right. Zyn owed his friend not only his livelihood, but almost his entire life itself. Those days after failing the Trial of Spirit were, without a doubt, the darkest of his life. What seemed to be a simple test of meditation had led to him emerging from his trance a broken man. The visions he saw had scarred him, and after being brought back from the brink of madness by Seela herself, he vowed to never again revisit those particular demons. His dreams, on the other hand, seemed to disagree.

“If that’s the case, then I have no choice,” Zyn finally said after a long stretch of silence between them. Seela’s eyes lit up with excitement.

“This will be good for you,” she smiled. “It will get you back to some semblance of normalcy.” Despite the urge to argue that point, Zyn stayed silent as Seela slipped herself from the booth and climbed to her feet.

“So where am I meeting my new client?” Zyn asked, getting to his feet as well.

“His ship is in Eastport, Docking Bay Thirty Seven Thirty Two. His name is Udo Horn and he’s been staying on his yacht, the Infinite.”

Of course, he would have a yacht, Zyn thought to himself. “It leaves at dawn, correct?”

“Would you expect anything different?” she beamed. “It’s good to see you again.”

“You, as well,” he told her, offering out a hand to shake.

Grabbing a hold of his hand, she quickly pulled him in for an unexpected hug. Her grip on him was tight, but he returned the sentiment but squeezing her firmly himself. They stood in their embrace for several moments, pulling the eyes of several of the parlor’s patrons to them, but paying them all no mind.

“Take care of yourself,” she told him after they finally released each other. “I don’t want you getting into any more trouble than you can handle.”

“You know I can’t promise that.” He felt himself grinning foolishly. “But you be careful as well, and may the Force be with you.”

“I would say the same to you, but I know you have problems with that.”

Zyn found the remark a kick below the belt to his pride. Coming from her, he knew it was all in jest, but the subject was still a bit of a sore spot for him. He knew his connection to the Force would forever be a wound that hadn’t quite healed.

“Goodbye, Zyn,” she told him.

“Farewell, Seela,” he returned with a forced smile.

Without another word, she spun on her heel and headed for the exit. As she walked, Zyn couldn't help but notice her lekku had twice crossed over each other as they fell down her back in a nonverbal message to him. He fought the urge to call her on the gesture, however, knowing it would lead exactly nowhere. Instead, he slipped back into his booth to watch the end of the race and wonder exactly what he’d gotten himself into.
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"The protectors of the Balance must stand on the edge of two worlds, accepted by neither, masters of both."

Butcher (Diamond) | Emperor's Hand* (BR) | Lost Gray* (SD) | Sentinel v4* (BR) | Reaper (AB) | D. Initiate (AS) | D. Apprentice LE v4 (SY) | Aeon v4 (CG) (WILLING TO TRADE) | Dark Sentinel/Aeon Staff (FO) | D. Prophecy Build Project (Pending)

TheDutchman
Knight Commander
*

Force Alignment: 701
Posts: 2798


Guardian Blue is my life


« Reply #6 on: August 09, 2018, 03:10:45 PM »

Wonderful follow up, Zyn!  Yes, focusing in on the mental state of our anti-hero is both enlightening and raises more questions... And with the introduction of Seela, we get to see another side.  Excellent storytelling; your conversations are organic, believable, and enjoyable, leaving me wanting more  Smiley

BTW: I LOVE the details e.g. Seela's lekku gestures, as they translate to something more...familiar shall we say for Zyn  Wink  It's things like that that really take me into the story.  Great job!

Looking forward to the next chapter!
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Maenowan Nexu Master of the Vhal'Dan

My sabers:Zearic's Aldrnari, Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, AS; Zearic's shoto, Apprentice v4 w/Obsidian, AS; Graflex SE w/Obsidian, GB; Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, CG; Dark Sentinel v4 w/Obsidian, BR; Sentinel LE v4 w/Obsidian, GB; Sentinel LE v4 stunt, EG, Aeon LE v4 stunt, FO

Lord_S_Gray
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: 75
Posts: 800



« Reply #7 on: August 09, 2018, 06:19:04 PM »

Cool little peak into Zyns past...what happened in that Trial of Spirit - and his Present situation floating somewhat aimlessly it seems. The relationship with Seela is interesting, the closeness is there and yet...that Jedi robe seems to be a barrier...A million credits to go to Kuat - if it sounds too good to be true...
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Lord_S_Gray

Surik: "Kreia, what are you—are you a Jedi, a Sith?"
Kreia: "Does it matter? Of course it does, such titles allow you to break the galaxy into light and dark, categorize it. Perhaps I am neither, and I hold both as what they are, pieces of a whole."

Karmack
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: 719
Posts: 3318


Light side points please.


« Reply #8 on: August 09, 2018, 06:31:49 PM »

Cool little peak into Zyns past...what happened in that Trial of Spirit - and his Present situation floating somewhat aimlessly it seems. The relationship with Seela is interesting, the closeness is there and yet...that Jedi robe seems to be a barrier...A million credits to go to Kuat - if it sounds too good to be true...

Agreed.  Beware!

Echoing Dutch and LSG.  The lekku gestures drew me in, they are intriguing.  :-)  And a great expansion and continuation of the story!  Looking forward to the next installment!
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Master Singer of the Mak'Tor

Taegin Roan
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: 1617
Posts: 5242


Lord of the Force


« Reply #9 on: August 09, 2018, 10:11:13 PM »

Like the other said, a great first chapter. Very intriguing in many ways, leaving us with a hunger for what is to come. Can't wait to see where this one leads us.
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"I am the Outcast's Shadow" - Taegin Roan
"We are the spark that will light the fire that will burn the first order down." - Poe Dameron

Fifth Knight of the Aeonix Order.

Avatar by DarthScrub

Karmack
Knight Commander
*

Force Alignment: 719
Posts: 3318


Light side points please.


« Reply #10 on: August 10, 2018, 05:52:09 AM »

I'm going to attempt for a weekly release of chapters on this, but I'm not going to say for sure that's what's going to happen...


Zyn, don't sweat a publishing schedule to hard.  :-)  None of us works on a deadline and we all have those days when things just flow and others when we can't break away from Real Life long enough to get a cup of coffee let alone hammer out 2000 words of fiction.  Just plug away and have fun!  :-) 

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Master Singer of the Mak'Tor

Zyn
Knight Templar
*

Force Alignment: 62
Posts: 335


What do I see? Light... Darkness.... Balance


« Reply #11 on: August 10, 2018, 08:14:06 AM »

Thank you everyone for the praise. As you may or may not have guessed, this isn't my first rodeo when it comes to writing (I am an indie author), but this is my first dabble into SciFi. I figured it shouldn't be too much different than what I'm used to writing, which is action and suspense, just new characters with their own arcs, and some updated technology. So far, so good as far as the writing goes, but we'll have to see what happens when i get down toward the bottom of my barrel of ideas...

Quote
Zyn, don't sweat a publishing schedule to hard.  :-)  None of us works on a deadline and we all have those days when things just flow and others when we can't break away from Real Life long enough to get a cup of coffee let alone hammer out 2000 words of fiction.  Just plug away and have fun!  :-)  

I understand how that goes, Karmack. Even being an indie author, I've still let over a year go by since my last book release, and my limited number of fans are letting me have it because of the delays. I'm trying my best not to become GRRM  Grin
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"The protectors of the Balance must stand on the edge of two worlds, accepted by neither, masters of both."

Butcher (Diamond) | Emperor's Hand* (BR) | Lost Gray* (SD) | Sentinel v4* (BR) | Reaper (AB) | D. Initiate (AS) | D. Apprentice LE v4 (SY) | Aeon v4 (CG) (WILLING TO TRADE) | Dark Sentinel/Aeon Staff (FO) | D. Prophecy Build Project (Pending)

TheDutchman
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: 701
Posts: 2798


Guardian Blue is my life


« Reply #12 on: August 10, 2018, 01:24:48 PM »

I'm trying my best not to become GRRM  Grin
Lol I hear you Zyn  Cheesy

That @#$%&! NEEDS to finish ASoIaF before he pulls a "Robert Jordan"  Wink
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Maenowan Nexu Master of the Vhal'Dan

My sabers:Zearic's Aldrnari, Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, AS; Zearic's shoto, Apprentice v4 w/Obsidian, AS; Graflex SE w/Obsidian, GB; Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, CG; Dark Sentinel v4 w/Obsidian, BR; Sentinel LE v4 w/Obsidian, GB; Sentinel LE v4 stunt, EG, Aeon LE v4 stunt, FO

Zyn
Knight Templar
*

Force Alignment: 62
Posts: 335


What do I see? Light... Darkness.... Balance


« Reply #13 on: August 15, 2018, 12:40:19 PM »

I know I said before that I was going to attempt to stick to a weekly delivery of "episodes", but seeing as I've gotten a lot farther than I planned in the past week, I'm posting a day early. Enjoy.

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2.

The trip to Kuat was far from anything Zyn could have considered exciting. He’d located the ship without issues, and after a quick chat with Thorne, the banker’s head of security, he found himself wondering why his presence was even required. A team of twelve heavily armed men stood watch against any form of aggressor, and anyone thinking of sneaking on board for nefarious means would find themselves in worlds of trouble. What could a lowly Jedi dropout provide that these men couldn’t?

After the initial briefing in which he was paid his half million credits and learning he would not meet Udo Horn until they disembarked, he had retreated to his meager stateroom aboard the Infinite. A bed was provided, but that was the extent of the luxuries for the guests outside of basic food and water drink. Despite the incomprehensible wealth this representative of the InterGalactic Bank seemed to have, guests and employees were on their own, so to speak.

Instead of fraternizing with others, Zyn kept to his room, meditating on what was before him. A number inquisitive mercenaries had attempted to speak with him about exactly who he was and what he could do, but he chose to remain silent. In his mind, he owed these men nothing, and no good would come out of revealing who he really was. Without a doubt, the need to prove himself their better was there, but for the time being, he was able to quiet the beast enough to reflect on his own thoughts.

Which one of these mercenaries was Seela’s acquaintance was beyond him. Zyn couldn’t place her even on the same world as these men. She was strong, independent, and had no reason to be in contact with any of them them, unless they were on the receiving end of her lightsaber. It was something that continued to bother him even as the ship dropped out of hyperspace and began its approach to Kuat. Before long, a loud knock came at his door, interrupting his thoughts.

“We’ve landed,” the head of security, Thorne, barked at him through the door. “Be ready in ten.”

Climbing to his feet, Zyn slowly donned his cloak and headed for the door while pulling up his hood. His heart unexpectedly began to race as he opened the door and stepped into the lounge with a nagging sense of worry tugging at his thoughts. Something was going to happen, of that he was sure, but what exactly, he couldn’t say. All he could do was clear his thoughts and do what needed to be done when the situation presented itself.

Only three members of the mercenary team were present in the lounge while the others were likely in the cargo bay, which had been converted into an armory for this deployment. Two men were talking to one another while eyeing Zyn suspiciously. He was about to ask if there was a problem when the third finished lacing his boot and approached with a friendly smile.

“Hi,” the young man greeting him with an outstretched hand. “You’re the specialist, right?” Zyn took his hand and gave it a firm shake, noting the strength in the mercenary’s grip.

“You could say that,” Zyn replied, taking his hand back once it was released. “I am Zyn.”

The young man looked like a fresh recruit, as his wide jaw and angled features were completely free of any sort of scarring or even age. Zyn felt a bit of envy, given the numerous scars he’d collected over his life and the added stresses he’d been under since leaving the Order, it all had left him looking older than he really was.

 “Hi, Zyn,” the recruit replied. “I’m…”

“Wex!” the head of security shouted from the doorway. “Why aren’t you in formation?” Turning his eyes back to the other two, Zyn noticed they’d stopped their conversation and were, instead, waiting for some entertainment value in their comrade’s scolding.

“Apologies, sir,” Wex responded, turning his back on Zyn and coming to attention in front of his superior.

“Fall in,” Thorne barked.

“Aye-aye, sir.” Without looking back, Wex ran off past his chief and through the door.

“You,” the chief started, pointing at Zyn. “I’ve got your orders.”

“I don’t work for you.”

“I don’t care. I’m responsible for Mr. Horn’s security, and you’re a part of that detail, therefore you will obey my orders or I will have you shot.”

Zyn found himself holding back a laugh. Sure, he was on a ship with a dozen well-armed men with enough training in their weapons to give him more trouble than he could handle, but the idea of accepting the challenge briefly crossed his mind. He’d been against similar odds before, but always with his master by his side.

“What are your orders?” Zyn huffed, remembering what Seela had told him and putting his thoughts of confrontation aside.

“When we step off this ship, you are to remain within five meters of Mr. Horn at all times,” Thorne barked. “I know who you are, so if you’re thinking of starting some kind of trouble, you will be sorely mistaken.”

The anger began rising in Zyn’s chest with every word spoken by Thorne. He talked as if Zyn were a fresh recruit in need of harsh discipline to be molded into a hardened soldier. While he was certainly green to any kind of mercenary work, his time with the Jedi had likely given him more experience in fighting most of Thorne’s men.

“If you know who I am, then you know what I can do” Zyn started, failing to control his temper. “I don’t need your condescension, or to be told how to march to your beat. I’m doing this as a favor to you and your boss, so if you don’t want me around, we can go our separate ways.”

Pulling open a pouch on his belt, Zyn retrieved roughly half of the credits he’d been paid and held them out to Thorne. The mercenary captain narrowed his gaze at him after looking at the credit chips. For a moment, it actually seemed if Thorne was considering the offer, but after several tense moments of silence, he finally spoke.

“Grab your gear,” Thorne said between his teeth before spinning on his heel and stomping toward the door. “It’s time to head out.”

Slipping the currency back into his belt pouch, Zyn pondered Thorne’s reaction. The mercenary captain obviously didn’t trust Zyn any more than Zyn trusted him. Zyn had even made it easy in offering some of the credits back, yet still the mercenary turned it down, which told him all he needed to know: Thorne needed him.

Walking silently to the ramp, he saw a line of mercenaries in black iconic Mandalorian helmets and armor disembarking with their weapons slung across their chests. Zyn wasn’t sure what the shipyard’s security would say about it, but left such matters to Thorne. Better for him worry about himself than a bunch of hired thugs. As the last of the line left, Zyn moved to fall in behind them, but unintentionally collided with a straggler.

“Sorry,” the young recruit named Wex said as the helmet tucked under his arm hit the floor.

“Apologies,” Zyn told him. “I didn’t see you coming.”

“Likewise.” Dropping one of the bags, Wex scooped up his helmet while picking up the bag he'd dropped with the same hand. “The captain is going to bust me for coming out last.”

“There are still more in the lounge,” Zyn pointed out. “You won’t be last.”

“He’ll still be on my case about it,” Wex lamented as they began to walk off the ship together. “I’m the new guy, and the new guy is always treated like shab, especially in Omega Company.”

“Omega Company?” Zyn asked with skepticism in his voice. “That’s the name of your outfit?”

“We’re a small force right now, but we’re getting bigger,” Wex explained. “This is only a quarter of what we have. Omega started out on Concordia, after the civil war. I was too young to fight, but it ended as I came of age. My parents were killed during the fighting and there was nothing left for me there. I wanted to fight, so I joined up with Omega.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Zyn told him as they stepped off the ramp.

“I’m not,” Wex said. “I’m a fighter, so that’s what I signed up to do.” Looking down at himself, Wex laughed at the irony of the situation of calling himself a fighter while carrying the company’s bags. “At least, I will when I move up the ranks.”

“Then I wish you luck in your endeavors,” Zyn nodded to him. “It’s not easy living this life.”

“I didn’t take you for a merc,” Wex told him, depositing the bags in a pile not far from the ramp. “More like a drifter. What are you doing here, anyway?”

“I find myself wondering the same thing. I was hired to provide close security to the client.”
“Close support? Without a weapon?”

Without thinking, Zyn swept aside his cloak, showing off his lightsaber hilt to the young mercenary. Wex’s jaw fell open in amazement as Zyn allowed his cloak to fall back over the weapon. Turning his eyes to the rest of the group, he saw they were gathered around their captain several yards away.

“Perhaps you should join your comrades,” Zyn told him. “Before you get yourself into any more trouble.”

Closing his mouth, Wex gave him a wide grin before donning his helmet and running off to join the rest of them. In Zyn’s opinion, the young man didn’t belong here. He was too upbeat and friendly to be a mercenary, but certainly had the foolhardiness to run off headlong into an unknown battle just because someone told him to do so. Chuckling silently to himself, Zyn couldn’t help but see much of his younger self in Wex.

The two mercenaries from the lounge, now armored up, walked quickly past Zyn to join their group, snapping him out of his thoughts. Despite the thought of being anywhere near Thorne, he swallowed his pride and began walking toward the meeting. It wasn’t until he was within ear shot that another nagging feeling pulled his attention back to the ship.

Before he could even question what the feeling meant, he was hit with such a strong force, it sent him skittering across the floor. The blast carried Zyn several meters away from where he was standing, coming to a violent stop against a shipping crate on the other side of the docking bay. Dazed, he began to collect himself and get to his feet.

The Infinite was left a smoldering wreck with parts scattered all over the docking bay. The entirety of the mercenary troop was down with only a small handful of men picking themselves up or attempting to rouse the others. Several dock workers were also down while security was already running on site, shouting orders in an attempt to contain the resulting fire.

Taking a step forward, Zyn found himself on unsteady legs. His head swam from the impact, and the muffled sound of shouts told him his ears had taken a beating in the explosion. Another faulty step sent him careening into another nearby shipping container, and it was only his weakened grip keeping him from tumbling back to the floor. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath to clear his thoughts and after opening his eyes, he noticed Thorne pointing directly at him, shouting something to his men.

“There’s the man responsible!” Thorne shouted as his words finally came into focus. “Arrest him, he did this!”

No one was reacting to Thorne’s orders, most too busy either picking themselves up or dealing with the fire now engulfing the remains of the ship. Zyn stood in shock as the captain continued to blame him for the explosion. Was this man really trying to pin this entire thing on him?

Before Zyn could even react to the charges, Thorne began to charge at him with a blaster drawn and pointed squarely at his head.
Logged

"The protectors of the Balance must stand on the edge of two worlds, accepted by neither, masters of both."

Butcher (Diamond) | Emperor's Hand* (BR) | Lost Gray* (SD) | Sentinel v4* (BR) | Reaper (AB) | D. Initiate (AS) | D. Apprentice LE v4 (SY) | Aeon v4 (CG) (WILLING TO TRADE) | Dark Sentinel/Aeon Staff (FO) | D. Prophecy Build Project (Pending)

Karmack
Knight Commander
*

Force Alignment: 719
Posts: 3318


Light side points please.


« Reply #14 on: August 15, 2018, 01:36:42 PM »

The phrase "me thinks thou dost protest to much" comes to mind...  Thorne is either very biased against young Zyn, or he did this and is looking for a scapegoat.  Either way, Zyn's day just got FAR more interesting...

So.  Now we get to see how far his saber work has progressed.  :-)

Nicely written, Zyn!  Engaging and well paced, and a great cliff-hanger to draw is into the next installment!  Liking it!   And Wex is also interesting.  Assuming he survived the destruction of the Infinite.

Nice installment!  Looking forward to more!
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Master Singer of the Mak'Tor

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