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Author Topic: Sins of the Father  (Read 1453 times)
mrg149
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: -145
Posts: 834


Peace & Purpose


« on: May 04, 2020, 07:52:29 AM »

I hope everyone enjoys this. I'm toying around with an idea and this is part of the result. Let me know what you think.

==================

A long time ago, in a galaxy
far, far away...

It is a time of open rebellion. Armored divisions of the GALACTIC EMPIRE have landed on the swamp planet MIMBAN in an effort to secure the planet’s vital resources. The MIMBANESE LIBERATION ARMY, eager to drive the Imperials from their home world at all costs, has engaged in a brutal guerilla war.

As the battle has wound its way to a near stalemate resulting in both sides fighting in entrenched positions, EMPEROR PALPATINE has dispatched the 501st LEGION along with his new apprentice, the brutal Sith Lord, DARTH VADER to quell the opposition and bring the planet to heel.

Through a series of quick, decisive engagements, the opposition is finally conquered. Amidst the carnage of the battlefield, mopping up exercises finish off the final survivors and rumors quickly spread of a surprise capture of an unexpected leader of the resistance...

PROLOGUE

The Stormtrooper commander looked around at the carnage surrounding him. He shook his head as he felt the mud that always seemed to be trying to suck him down into the depths of Mimban itself pulling at his armored feet. The area was littered with the broken bodies of combatants from both sides here where the fighting had raged with the most intensity. The Imperial Stormtroopers were scouting the area for injured comrades or finishing off the pitiful cries of the wounded with blaster bolts. He watched as a fallen Mimbanese was dispatched and went limp as its head was reduced to a cloud of blood and bone. He sadly noted the bodies of fallen troopers, some he knew personally, in their white armor now stained and streaked red with their own blood. The losses to his unit were incredibly high but nothing compared to what had befallen their enemy.

He shook his head in disgust and some mingled pity at the enemy they had faced now for some time. He had to admit, the Mimbanese Liberation Army had fought and fought hard. They were not as well armed or well trained as the Imperial troops that had been dispatched to quell the uprising. However, their guerilla campaign had been effective enough to create havoc and, eventually, a stalemate that lasted far longer than anticipated. It was said the Emperor himself had flown into a fit of rage as report after report of failures and setbacks in the campaign were relayed to him. Finally, after many months of inconclusive combat, he had had enough and dispatched his final solution to the problem, Lord Vader and the 501st. The Mimbanese proved no match.

The Commander shook his helmeted head. "They're not even soldiers," He muttered below the level of his comm's ability to pick his voice up. "They're just...people." He toed at a few bodies to see if they moved and stared out at the carnage around him. He noted that the latest body he was checking was that of a young Mimbanese male. The young, muscular creature was draped over the body of a Stormtrooper with his eyes staring sightlessly at the sky and mouth open in a snarl of defiance. The commander felt a small prickle of sorrow for the boy. This was no place for someone so young. There was no honor in the killing or defeating of these people.

"Commander!"

He turned at the shout and watched the small party of troopers picking their way across the battlefield towards him. At their head, stood a large figure, cloaked in black from head to toe and oozing menace, Lord Vader. Unlike the troopers and other combatants around him who were caked with mud, blood and other fluids, he was pristine, as if the mud wanted no part of him. His breath came in raspy, mechanical sounds that only added to his imposing presence.

"Lord Vader." The Commander stiffened to attention and dipped his head as Vader approached.

"Our victory is complete." He gestured at the battlefield littered with corpses. "All resistance has been eliminated."

"Yes, sir."

Vader's head swung around as if he were looking for something and not seeing it. "Their leader, have you found him?"

"Not yet, Lord Vader. The unit is scouting the battlefield for any signs." He resisted his body's insistent need to shake at the sight of Lord Vader and swallowed hard. "Sir, the men have been asking if the rumors about the leader of the resistance here. Is it true that their leader was..."

"A Jedi, yes!" Vader said ominously. "...one of a number that has eluded me for some time." Vader hooked his hands in his belt, exposing the hilt of his lightsaber and looked around. The trooper commander looked at it with fascination and dread as there were many rumors of what that weapon did to those who displeased the Emperor's enforcer.

"I am sure that my men will find his body in short order, my lord." He said with a confidence he certainly did not feel.

"See to it that they do, Commander." He pointed an accusing finger at the Stormtrooper. A clear indication of his threat. "The Emperor wishes confirmation and I intend on delivering it to him soon." The Dark Lord of the Sith looked around. "Where are your men currently searching?"

The trooper cocked his head as he considered a moment and nodded as he came up with the answer. He gestured towards a muddy gulch nearby where the bodies were heaped more thickly than anywhere else on the field. "We think that this would be the most likely location over here, Lord Vader."

"Show me..." Vader craned his head as if he were sniffing the air for a scent. "..and perhaps the Force will be able to find what your men cannot." He strode towards the mound, treading over and on the bodies as he made for the mound. The Stormtrooper Commander hurried after him and the other troopers either scattered ahead of Lord Vader or came to attention as the party passed by. When they reached the mound, Vader took in the scene before him. The fighting in this sector had been fierce and brutal which was evidenced by the horrific wounds the dead of both sides had suffered. The Stormtrooper Commander shuddered as he remembered that many of those dead had fought with bare hands and some even their teeth until they were cut down. Most of the corpses were so badly mutilated that they were now hardly recognizable as more than clumps of flesh.

Vader surveyed the scene, his eerie breathing sounding like giant sighs of exasperation. "...and yet, I sense..." His head swiveled as if puzzled by something.
The Stormtrooper Commander watched as Vader stepped over the twisted corpses at the top of the heap. Vader was halfway up the mound when a sudden flurry of action caught the Commander's eyes. At first, a head rose slightly above the bodies, then a blood-spattered figure considered dead by the Commander sprang up behind Vader but within reach of the Stormtrooper Commander. The figure had long, dark hair and a grizzled beard and his face was contorted in both pain and grim purpose. The figure was wrapped in tattered clothing that was originally a sandy brown robe and tunic but was now ripped and stained with blood and gore to the point that it was hard to distinguish. His hand held a metallic shaft that suddenly lit up with a snap-hiss into brilliant Azure light. The figure, which was most likely the Jedi, lurched forward and began to rush towards his target which seemed unawares.

"Lord Vader!" shouted the trooper "Look out!" He moved without thinking and battered the Jedi in the back, spinning him around as Vader turned to look on. The commander was now in full battle mode and he whipped up his E-11 to take aim at his target. However, the Jedi put on a burst of speed and was quickly in striking range of the Commander. He swept out with the lightsaber and cleaved the blaster's barrel end cleanly off. Inside his helmet, the Trooper's eyes widened in fear and the realization that he was quickly running out of options. He made to grab the Jedi's hand as it swung by in order to grab his wrist and force him into hand-to-hand combat. As he reached out the Jedi swung his lightsaber back quickly and, with a sizzling flash and sick *THUMP* the trooper's arm was cleanly severed and the wound cauterized. He fell to the ground and began screaming as his nerve-endings lit up with pain. He watched in continuing horror as the Jedi was poised in mid-strike above him, eyes wild. The trooper closed his eyes and figured that this was his last moment. He thought of his wife that he had left back on their homeworld of Selucami and felt regret for leaving her this way. When nothing happened in the next breath and then the next, he opened his eyes and  felt them again, go wide with horror. The Jedi was still there, still in the same pose. However, he was now floating in mid-air and twisting around, his hand dropping the weapon which immediately deactivated and going towards his throat.

"Your trap was predictable, Jedi and you are no match for the Dark Side." said Vader ominously. He stood with his left hand clutched out in front of him as if it were gripping something invisible and pulling it towards him. His right hand went to his belt and grabbed his own lightsaber which opened with its own menacing snap-hiss and a blade of pure red light. "This ends now." Intoned Vader as he lanced the air with the lightsaber as the Jedi drew close enough for him to strike. The body fell limply to the ground amidst all of the other dead and moved no more. "...all too easy." said the towering Dark Lord of the Sith as he extinguished his lightsaber and replaced it on his belt.

He regarded the Stormtrooper Commander for a moment before motioning to the other troopers in the area.

"Take your commander back to the Medical Bay and have him treated."

The Dark Lord stooped down to the Commander and said to him something he would never forget:
"Your bravery will not go unnoticed Commander. Though your fighting days in the Empire are finished, I will see that you are duly compensated for your actions and your loss."

Darth Vader stood and turned away, marching towards the forward command area, no doubt to make his report back to the Emperor about the completion of the operation on Mimban. He stopped for a moment and surveyed the scene before addressing the trooper who was now in command of the unit. "Prepare to have all units return to the The Devastator within the hour. We will teach Mimban a lesson in defying the Emperor with an orbital bombardment of the capital." He turned and continued his trek to the command post as the trooper saluted with a "Yes Sir, Lord Vader!"

As he was being carried off towards the Medical bay, the commander, now falling into shock,  felt the urge to protest a moment. The Mimbanese Liberation Army was defeated. Their revolt had been utterly crushed. Was this really necessary? But shock took over and he blacked out as the sound of Darth Vader's breathing apparatus faded into the distance of his unconscious mind.
Logged


“Heeded my words not, did you? "Pass on what you have learned." Strength, mastery, hmm... but weakness, folly, failure, also. Yes, failure, most of all. The greatest teacher, failure is. Luke, we are what they grow beyond. That is the true burden of all masters."
– Yoda


ARSENAL:
*Dominix LE v2 - "Dark Apprentice"
*Dominix LE v3 - "INVICTUS"
*"GUARDIAN" -Ask for Picture (non-US saber)
-Whatever Points-

Lord_S_Gray
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Force Alignment: 306
Posts: 1659



« Reply #1 on: May 04, 2020, 03:18:48 PM »

Great job mrg149, good engaging start right into the aftermath of a horrific battle, great descirptions of the devastation, the bodies, and Vader as if the mud wanted no part of him great line, he just stands there as menace as he should. Where it goes from here who knows as you've certainly left many possible lines opne, the Commander, his family possibly, a Mimbanese perhaps - would be interested to find out!

And an opening crawl!
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Lord_S_Gray

Surik: "Kreia, what are you—are you a Jedi, a Sith?"
Kreia: "Does it matter? Of course it does, such titles allow you to break the galaxy into light and dark, categorize it. Perhaps I am neither, and I hold both as what they are, pieces of a whole."

mrg149
Knight Commander
*

Force Alignment: -145
Posts: 834


Peace & Purpose


« Reply #2 on: May 04, 2020, 07:49:08 PM »

one cannot simply have Star Wars without a crawl…

& thanks for the generous compliments
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“Heeded my words not, did you? "Pass on what you have learned." Strength, mastery, hmm... but weakness, folly, failure, also. Yes, failure, most of all. The greatest teacher, failure is. Luke, we are what they grow beyond. That is the true burden of all masters."
– Yoda


ARSENAL:
*Dominix LE v2 - "Dark Apprentice"
*Dominix LE v3 - "INVICTUS"
*"GUARDIAN" -Ask for Picture (non-US saber)
-Whatever Points-

Karmack
Forumverse Loremaster
Master of Ceremonies
SaberForum.Com Moderator
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: 1147
Posts: 5594


Light side points please.


« Reply #3 on: May 05, 2020, 08:26:58 AM »

Echoing LSG, great opening!  It ... feels.   Not sure how else to say it.   You could feel the essence of the scene.   Nice job.

And the crawl.   Definitely the crawl.   :-)
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JNovaarii
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Force Alignment: 2
Posts: 87



« Reply #4 on: May 05, 2020, 11:20:24 AM »

Excellent story.  Can’t wait to read more!!


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current saber : Initiate v4 with fire orange blade, soon to have Obsidian v3 sound and av switch installed

wishlist dream saber:  Dark Initiate v5 with gold claws, with most of the black anodizing removed to create a custom look

"I am neither a servant of the light or the dark, but a servant of the balanced will of the Force. and serve the greater good of the galaxy"- Jeskaaro Nova'arii, Suva'arii Knight and Elite Guardian of the Fi'arii Empire

Light or dark points appreciated as warranted, My alignment will remain more or less neutral

JNovaarii
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Force Alignment: 2
Posts: 87



« Reply #5 on: May 05, 2020, 11:21:03 AM »

Excellent story.  Can’t wait to read more!!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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current saber : Initiate v4 with fire orange blade, soon to have Obsidian v3 sound and av switch installed

wishlist dream saber:  Dark Initiate v5 with gold claws, with most of the black anodizing removed to create a custom look

"I am neither a servant of the light or the dark, but a servant of the balanced will of the Force. and serve the greater good of the galaxy"- Jeskaaro Nova'arii, Suva'arii Knight and Elite Guardian of the Fi'arii Empire

Light or dark points appreciated as warranted, My alignment will remain more or less neutral

TheDutchman
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Force Alignment: 1026
Posts: 3842


Avatar courtesy of For Tyeth


« Reply #6 on: May 05, 2020, 03:16:32 PM »

First off: welcome to the Fanfic forums, mrg!

The opening crawl really helps to set the mood: I'm immediately reminded of when I first saw ANH, the epic nature and surprise that emerged, keeping me enthralled.  Your story is precisely like that!  And it's always nice to see Vader in top form, a force of nature crushing everything underfoot in his role as the "implacable man"  Smiley

But the real heart of the story is the Stormtrooper Commander.  This is a character that makes for excellent pathos: he's not evil and believes (or at least did) in the Empire's propaganda, doing a job that he is invested in.  But seeing Vader as the "Emperor's enforcer" becomes that moral event horizon that makes him question just what exactly are the motives of those in charge.  And this is very well done indeed  Smiley

I hope that you continue this story, mrg!  I know that I'm hooked  Cheesy
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My sabers:Zearic's Aldrnari, Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, AS; Zearic's shoto, Apprentice v4 w/Obsidian, AS; Graflex SE w/Obsidian, GB; Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, CG; Dark Sentinel v4 w/Obsidian, BR; Sentinel LE v4 w/Obsidian, GB; Initiate v5 w/Obsidian, AS; Sentinel LE v4 stunt, EG; Aeon LE v4 stunt, FO; Dominix v4 stunt, BR; Aeon v3 stunt, SY

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