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Author Topic: Legacy of the Aether  (Read 71792 times)
TheDutchman
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« Reply #75 on: January 23, 2018, 12:15:29 PM »

It's true: this is a wonderful story!  Can't wait to read more!
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Sig courtesy of DarthScrub

Cataphract Triarch of the Vhal'Dan

My sabers:Zearic's Aldrnari, Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, AS; Zearic's shoto, Apprentice v4 w/Obsidian, AS; Graflex SE w/Obsidian, GB; Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, CG; Dark Sentinel v4 w/Obsidian, BR; Sentinel LE v4 w/Obsidian, GB; Initiate v5 w/Obsidian, AS; Sentinel LE v4 stunt, EG; Aeon LE v4 stunt, FO; Dominix v4 stunt, BR; Aeon v3 stunt, SY

Lord_S_Gray
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« Reply #76 on: January 23, 2018, 09:31:24 PM »

Yeah.  I am looking forward to the ending.  :-) 

Ending....might be a while...My first draft has 50 chapters....currently this is the end of the Vyth Arc...still have to see what Jarys and Soryu have been up to....and then more on Milaea.

PS Forgot to mention, this particular Arc owes a lot to You Guys for including Odjina in your tales, notably Karmacks Interlude Dawn of a Knight -

"Master Singers bore an additional carved ring of Onyx around the gem, highlighting the bright stone with a black ring, a tradition dating back to the Masters of Song mourning the loss of Kage Odjina centuries earlier. "

Really pushed me to try and make sure he was worthy of that kind of commemoration, not just as a Leader post Exile, and a Warrior (holding his own against two Aethans is probably a record of some kind) but also just a compassionate welcoming person. 

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Lord_S_Gray

Surik: "Kreia, what are you—are you a Jedi, a Sith?"
Kreia: "Does it matter? Of course it does, such titles allow you to break the galaxy into light and dark, categorize it. Perhaps I am neither, and I hold both as what they are, pieces of a whole."

Lord_S_Gray
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Force Alignment: 428
Posts: 1903



« Reply #77 on: January 23, 2018, 09:41:17 PM »

Chapter 19
Valens
The Caverns of Vyth should have been silent.

He had piled the bodies in the main chamber, 17 in all scattered about – he had been surprised at the brutality with which Milaea had dispatched some of the Mak’Tor - he had destroyed the various droids and security footage, he would leave nothing but corpses for anyone to find. Milaea he placed in the Andis Med-bay.

There shouldn’t be a sound apart from his own breath and footsteps…

But the Song…the Song of what had happened here was imprinted in the walls, into the permafrost still deep in the rock – or so Odjina would’ve described it.  He knew how the Aether could imprint a person, a place, an object all too well.  One could not release such energies without some trace, but permanence like this was unusual.

He returned to collect the lightsabres, the Kage’s bloodied robe, discarded as his body vanished a fitting container.  Already filled with Permafrost crystals…all of them imprinted with the song of Vyth he glanced across the row of sabres he had left…

One was missing.

The snap-hiss of a sabre ignited behind him, the girl, Ha'Ona'Mack, all of seven holding her mother Ho’Li’Macks lightsabre against him, beside her the last Astromech, Four-Ten…he hadn’t paid much attention to the girl until now, she favoured her mother’s looks…he reached out with the aether - she shuddered but remained defiant. 

The Song…the song had imprinted on her as well…what legacy could that leave upon a child he wondered.  Perhaps that was what Odjina had meant…yes his song, and that of all who had died here lived on in this girl.

He knelt before her close enough to feel the energy of the blade on his face,

“Are you going to fight me Ha’Ona’Mack?”

“You’re a Sith, you’re evil,” She trembled through tear stained eyes,

Sith…just as Odjina had labelled him - even the Gray reverted to simple terms to try and classify what they could not understand it seemed …

“Yes, yes I am” it was a useful enough fiction. He ought to just kill her and smash the droid…but as he looked back to the corpses behind him…piled just as he had piled his own peoples corpses twenty years before…

He turned to the Astromech, they were trustworthy droids.

“Take this Child of the Song back to your people’s home droid…tell them what becomes of those who we set our gaze against,” 

Ha’Ona’Mack looked confused, but kept her blade up, she was smart enough not to attack him…he hoped her people would follow that same path…

He paused briefly to observe the glowing energies from the sabre she kept at his face…he had heard Ho’Li refer to her sabres crystal as the Ancient One…perhaps he should take it for future study.

The girl remained staunch in her stance as he tried to get a sense of the crystal within…but it was blank to him…a safeguard…a…ah…he understood its function now…

The crystal was of no value to him, it would destroy itself before yielding its knowledge…and…the girl had lost enough already....as much as Milaea if not more he thought with a touch of guilt.

He stood and left Ha’Ona to the droids care, sweeping the other sabres into the tattered robe with a thought.
********************************************************************
Milaea slept soundly in the Andis only bed as he piloted out of the system.

Odjina had never wanted to harm her…he had believed this was all Valens doing… He could not have understood…Valens had no desire to manipulate Milaea, teach her yes, but her choices must be her own.  Odjina’s only folly may have been distrusting him and overlooking the reality that a girl as lovely as Milaea could still plot his destruction….

Aethena had been like that too, she could make you love her, put all your hopes in her…then laugh as she used them to shatter you…whether Milaea was the same….

As he punched in the hyperspace co-ordinates he considered the next move…he had hoped Milaea would’ve embraced her power by now…but even faced with the Kage in a life and death struggle she had held back.

Aethena would not have…she would’ve walked straight into those caves and without preamble slain most, stripped the Kage of his knowledge then added the prettiest women to her harem. 

Milaea was different…and hopefully would continue to be so…yet time was not on their side, he needed her to come to herself soon.

Trying to find her place, today she had chosen to side with the Jedi…and paid the price for doing so – she would never fully side with them again.  She had rejected the Mak’Tor and, if she hadn’t already, she would soon reject the Jedi. 

Then she would look for belonging in the only place it could be truly be found.

With her people, her family.
********************************************************************
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kimar

“Is it done” he gazed at the image through his steeped fingers,

“It’s done,” Valens replied

Kimar allowed a line of contempt and victory to curl at his mouth.

“I was surprised Odjina is…was…still around to be honest…old fool…were there many others, I imagine only four or five,”

Valens hologram flickered, “Not enough to pose a threat to us at any rate…,”

The original plan had been for Valens to infiltrate and provide details for a full strike, but given there had only been apparently five odd Gray Jedi, one an old Twi’lek fool, he had obviously taken the initiative to wipe them out himself…good Kimar thought, the less people who knew about such operations the better.

“And the Padawan?”

“Performed exceptionally well, she saw through the Gray lies quickly and was instrumental in bringing them down, her willingness to put aside her doubts to serve the order of the Council is commendable, along with her abilities.”

Kimar smiled,

“Excellent…I will arrange for her Trials to begin as soon as she arrives…given her performance I will count this mission toward them….oh and Master Neirai is awake and recovering, I’m sure her padawan will want to hear that.”

A strange expression flashed across the hologram…or perhaps it was just signal interference.

“I will inform her immediately master, Andis out,” short and to the point…he may be slightly unorthodox with his armour and blasters…but he was discrete, efficient and deadly. 

Whilst Valens did not represent what he ultimately wanted or the Jedi…he was what was needed in the interim.  This Padawan however might prove a true bastion of the Code…he would have to take a deeper personal interest in her.
********************************************************************
Chancellor Orvith had only been in power for two years, but already was proving more of a nuisance than all his predecessors.  He was deeply enmeshed with a number of corporations that utilised slave labour outside the Republic for numerous goods, textiles, vehicles, furniture…with low costs they could undercut more advanced automated manufacturing within the Republic. 

Orvith had been especially keen therefore to deal with the increasing insurgency of the Sons of Kessel, who had the temerity to free slaves.  Kimar had some sympathy for them…but also saw the danger, if their funding could be traced back to Republic citizens tensions with the Hutts would increase…the Hutts in turn would give tacit approval for pirates, arms dealers and other lowlifes to target Republic space and make policing the Republic even harder.

“How is the mission going,” Orvith asked in his dry tones, it was just the two of them in his office, the skyline of Coruscant behind the chancellor framed in blue curtains a shade darker than the Duros skin.

“Master Gurrlum is investigating leads amongst Republic aid organisations,” it had been Orvith who prompted the investigation to Cygrat that had then revealed the potential Sith warrior Master Neirai and Padawan Milaea had fought.

The Duros eyes squinted in disapproval,

“I do not like Jedi meddling within the Republic like this,” suppressing his annoyance Kimar sought to allay his fears

“They are merely picking up the trail, there will be no more active operations in Republic space,” Kimar wanted to keep any fighting outside the Republic just as much as Orvith did, but investigations within the Republic were what the Jedi existed for, Orvith and his ilk simply hated anyone looking in on their affairs.

His goal was clear, to keep things within the Republic as controlled and lawful as possible, outside of their borders he didn’t care.  The Jedi would serve as the shining wall to keep these two places apart as much as possible.

“Very well, now there is the matter of the labour strikes on Antar IV….” the Duros went on but Kimar tuned out, another task that needed Jedi attention…he believed in the Republic and democracy, that the Jedi needed to serve them with little question…yes the Senators and Chancellor may be corrupt…but they were the elected government, the oversight the Jedi needed…overtime things would change with his subtle guidance. 

After all, whilst Chancellors would come and go, one thing would stay the same…and that was him.
********************************************************************
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Milaea
She sat on the bed of the Andis, observing Valens neatly stacked possessions, lock cases for blasters, grenades, explosives. 

This was the true face of the Jedi, Guardians of a violently imposed peace, if not explicit then always implied by their carrying sabres…the ultimate coercive force of the Republic. And  a Justice that saw each Knight act as judge, jury and executioner on every mission. 

This was not the Order that Soryu and Sofa had trained her for, not the Order of the Masters of Old Yoda had told her stories about when he would visit Soryu while she was there after her private lessons.  Were those tales, those teachings just that – ideals never to be realised?

Or had the Jedi simply lost their way somewhere…but lost it in such a way that…they couldn’t see how lost they really were.  Maybe they needed someone like Soryu or Gurrlum to go above, separate them from the politics, refocus and renew…

She could see the bodies piled there…she hadn’t seen it with her own eyes, they had left the planet while she was still unconcious…yet she could still see it somehow as her eyes filled with tears.

Sofa had taught her better than to brood on what was done…but still…She couldn’t change what happened on Vyth…but maybe…maybe she could take a lesson from it…become part of a change in the Order that would mean something like Vyth would never happen again.
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Lord_S_Gray

Surik: "Kreia, what are you—are you a Jedi, a Sith?"
Kreia: "Does it matter? Of course it does, such titles allow you to break the galaxy into light and dark, categorize it. Perhaps I am neither, and I hold both as what they are, pieces of a whole."

Karmack
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« Reply #78 on: January 23, 2018, 10:21:31 PM »

Ending....might be a while...My first draft has 50 chapters....currently this is the end of the Vyth Arc...still have to see what Jarys and Soryu have been up to....and then more on Milaea.

PS Forgot to mention, this particular Arc owes a lot to You Guys for including Odjina in your tales, notably Karmacks Interlude Dawn of a Knight -

"Master Singers bore an additional carved ring of Onyx around the gem, highlighting the bright stone with a black ring, a tradition dating back to the Masters of Song mourning the loss of Kage Odjina centuries earlier. "

Really pushed me to try and make sure he was worthy of that kind of commemoration, not just as a Leader post Exile, and a Warrior (holding his own against two Aethans is probably a record of some kind) but also just a compassionate welcoming person. 



Thanks.  I figured from the beginning when Odjina first appeared that he would have been something special, one of those "legendary" heroes who might grow larger than they really were but who are closer to the legend than most would think.  He's become that.  Thank you.  :-)
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Master Singer of the Mak'Tor

Karmack
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« Reply #79 on: January 23, 2018, 10:43:19 PM »

And another great entry!  Wow.  There's pathos there aplenty.  And a lot of regret.

I like the scene of Milaea pondering the choice, pondering her lost innocence - and able to see that the Jedi under Kimar are indeed lost.  And they don't even realize it.

Valens' reasoning is utterly consistent with his character.  He's been working toward that restoration of his own people from day one, and he's still on target.  Whether he admits it or not I perceive that he placed Milaea where he did to manipulate her into making the choice she did, to separate her from all but "her own".   Ironically, the very inclusiveness of the Mak'Tor - they see all who come as children of the Maker, and therefore anyone can be 'one of them' as it were - was the core threat to Valens' plan.  Though as a warrior Odjina was more powerful in the cave with the aid of the permafrost than he had anticipated...

Reminds me of Karmack creating his own 'chorus' of crystals to deploy in combat when needed.  Hmm....

I still feel like Milaea hasn't reached the true decision point yet.  Will she go the way of the goddess - the temptation is there - or will she be different? 

Time will tell.  There's much left to learn here.  :-)
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Master Singer of the Mak'Tor

Taegin Roan
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Lord of the Force


« Reply #80 on: January 24, 2018, 06:30:25 AM »

Wow, so you are writing an Epic. Sweet! Before they were just novels or short stories, but now you've gone into full blown EPIC MODE! Can't wait to see what is coming.

As the the chapter, I am almost more scared of Kimar than I am of Valens and Milaea. He wan't the Jedi to survive, and thrive, but he also wants more than that. He wants them to rule the Galaxy, and that is what scares me. The fact that someone within the Jedi order (and in such a high position of authority) is willing, and even wants the Jedi to be more is truly terrifying. This promises to be an interesting story. And I love the fact that you are doing different Arcs. That is a good way to tie everything together by making a whole story, but also have many different decisions being made.

Oh yeah, and I loved that little tidbit with Ha'Ona'Mack. The fact that he let her live, and the fact that she is of Clan Mack, makes me think that Karm might have some more knowledge than the others do. Maybe. And the fact that Valens understood what the crystal was, yet knew he couldn't access it, that was great. Even he knows not everything can be solved by strength. Wonderfully written chapter and continuation of the story.
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"I am the Outcast's Shadow" - Taegin Roan
"Confronting fear is the Destiny of a Jedi" - Luke Skywalker
"So this is how liberty dies: with thunderous applause." - Padmé Amidala

TheDutchman
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« Reply #81 on: January 24, 2018, 11:48:57 AM »

Magnificent!  TR hit on something that I wish to echo: you really are writing a SW Epic.  Hmm...Valens<->Odysseus  Wink

On a more serious note, it seems that Valens isn't quite as emotionally cauterized as he presents if Ha'Ona'Mack can evoke a feeling of guilt, however small and ephemeral. Still, Aethans have a much different moral barometer than humans and Valens' assertion that Ha'Ona'Mack (and Odjina) see him as Sith is limiting and ultimately incorrect. But I doubt most humans would perceive such Olympian views after the wholesale slaughter of their families.

I have said it before and I reiterate now: this is GOOD writing.  I can only hope that Milaea's humanity has taken root before the Goddess within asserts control...

But that's another chapter  Wink
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Sig courtesy of DarthScrub

Cataphract Triarch of the Vhal'Dan

My sabers:Zearic's Aldrnari, Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, AS; Zearic's shoto, Apprentice v4 w/Obsidian, AS; Graflex SE w/Obsidian, GB; Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, CG; Dark Sentinel v4 w/Obsidian, BR; Sentinel LE v4 w/Obsidian, GB; Initiate v5 w/Obsidian, AS; Sentinel LE v4 stunt, EG; Aeon LE v4 stunt, FO; Dominix v4 stunt, BR; Aeon v3 stunt, SY

Lord_S_Gray
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Force Alignment: 428
Posts: 1903



« Reply #82 on: January 24, 2018, 09:57:55 PM »

Thanks again guys appreciate it! One of the thing I wanted to do was to keep the story without obvious good or bad guys but instead vey fallible people dealing with very difficult situations that their own responses tend to make worse rather than better.  

Credit to Karmack for letting me integrate the Mack Clan, helps both our stories, as Dutchman often says gives them all more depth with such connections, I think this particular one especially provides a really strong link.

Taegin spot on re Kimar, really he is the only one who got what he wanted from the Vyth Arc, it was a Tragedy for everyone else involved in some way (especially Odjina!) none of them wanted any of that to happen but couldn’t find a way out.  

Dutchamn hit on another concept I wanted to slide in, in a lot of myths you need to know a Demons True Name to destroy it…the Mak’Tor label Valens a Sith and Kimar labels Jarys Sith of Cygrat because they have no other word for what they are seeing, and as such their responses are [as you will see] are...misguided.

But you are all right ultimately it’s all about Milaea and her final choice, against the backdrop of Kimars time as grand Master.

Now for the last two chapters I managed to finish on my last day before I go back to work!
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Lord_S_Gray

Surik: "Kreia, what are you—are you a Jedi, a Sith?"
Kreia: "Does it matter? Of course it does, such titles allow you to break the galaxy into light and dark, categorize it. Perhaps I am neither, and I hold both as what they are, pieces of a whole."

Taegin Roan
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Force Alignment: 2066
Posts: 6256


Lord of the Force


« Reply #83 on: January 24, 2018, 10:06:44 PM »


Dutchamn hit on another concept I wanted to slide in, in a lot of myths you need to know a Demons True Name to destroy it…the Mak’Tor label Valens a Sith and Kimar labels Jarys Sith of Cygrat because they have no other word for what they are seeing, and as such their responses are [as you will see] are...misguided.


I didn't even think about this, but that totally makes sense. It will be interesting to see how you deal with this.
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"I am the Outcast's Shadow" - Taegin Roan
"Confronting fear is the Destiny of a Jedi" - Luke Skywalker
"So this is how liberty dies: with thunderous applause." - Padmé Amidala

Lord_S_Gray
Knight Commander
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Force Alignment: 428
Posts: 1903



« Reply #84 on: January 24, 2018, 10:10:22 PM »

Chapter 20
Soryu
It was a nice office, clean white lines, touches of red here and there, Gurrlum sat directly before the Director, Soryu to the side.  

“You understand that we take confidentiality very seriously,” the Director said earnestly,

“I do…and I do not want to create a problem for you, but you must understand this is a very serious situation”  Gurrlum replied,

The Director of Logistics and Resources for the Corellian Benevolent Society sighed heavily....Soryu could sense his conflicting emotions, he didn’t want to imperil the work his organisation did in providing support for former slaves….namely providing the ships and emergency aid the Sons of Kessel called in once that had liberated a factory, mine or brothel.  But he also did not want to hinder a Jedi investigation.

Gurrlum could sense it too and offered an out.

“We don’t want to interfere with your work,” he exuded calm and compassion in the force, “if you could perhaps just give us an idea of where the next pick-ups might be…we promise we will not interfere in the operation, simply hang back and speak to the…other organisation members…thereafter. “

The Director still looked a little uncertain, “I don’t want the…other organisation…to be held up…but if this individual is as dangerous as you say…perhaps they would be better off without him…”  he sighed again and pressed a few keys on his computer…

“I’ll send you the transponder codes of our quick response unit…if anyone is going to have a chance of running into the actual soldiers it’s them.”

Gurrlum nodded appreciatively,

“You’ve helped a lot of people today Director…” he stood, Soryu following suit,

“Thank you for this, and all your good work,” Soryu added
***************************************************************************************
Arjuca was another dead end…it had been weeks of following leads from various aid agencies about where their target might be…

Target…Soryu checked himself…was it so easy to slip into calling another sentient being a target…de-humanising it to a thing to be pursued…

The slaves were ushered out of the workshops, they were well fed and clean for slaves…but then they had to be to produce the ‘hand-made’ fabrics and clothing that fetched such a high price in the core worlds, without getting them grimy.  

The streets around the factory were littered with the sullen signs of battle, the Sons of Kessel moving through gradually picking up the corpses.  The Jedi had not participated, as per Kimar orders this was not their fight, this was not the Republic…so Soryu had to keep reminding himself as he felt the living force cry out for justice, for safety, for hope, with each slave that plodded past him

The leader of the Sons, Keison was just behind talking to Gurrlum, this was the fourth raid they had observed following their leads, Keison wanted to know what was going on.  In the force Soryu could feel he did not like the answer.  Soryu stood up trying to shake off the ill feeling he should be fighting with them, not just watching them, and headed over to join his fellow master.

“You want me to turnover one of my men?”  the bald, scarred commander stood arms folded, presence strong and defiant…the strength of a man with a just cause, the defiance of a man who would never again be force to submit…the scar where a slave brand had been cut from his forehead spoke to both these qualities.

“You must understand, this individual is likely just as much a danger to you and your movement as anyone else,” Gurrlum tried to reason with him, he was an excellent leader and manager, something Soryu had never excelled at.

“So you claim…but here is my position,” he leaned forward, “a bunch of Jedi hang around my operations, don’t lift a finger…same thing they’ve been doing for decades…fine whatever, but then they ask me to turn over a Squad that’s been on the front lines for the better part of the last 15 years, saved thousands of slaves, and for what, cause he got into a fight with a couple of your guys?”  

He leaned back and sighed, “I got nothing against you Jedi, but I got no reason to help you either, look around, you guarding ‘peace and justice’ on this world, or any of the others?”  

Soryu could not say they were.  “Move it up,” came the call from a loud speaker, it was only a matter of time before the Slavers retaliated, they had little time.

Gurrlum too remained silent,

“That’s what I thought,” Keison went on, “Now why would I help you and not my brothers in arms?”  

This all felt wrong, Soryu knew Gurrlum could feel it too…the over caution that had followed the disaster of the archives project…the control Kimar had been asserting in Yoda’s absence…it all felt wrong…

“Your brother or not…we are tasked with finding him…” Gurrlum said firmly, refusing to answer Keison’s question, “If you will not assist us…we will not compel you…however we will not cease out investigation either… I’m sorry it’s come to this…”  

Jedi arguing with the leader of a group who freed slaves from Hutts outside of the Republic was emblematic of the incomprehensible position the Jedi had found themselves in…serving the Republic and the Light to the exclusion of what seemed True and Just.
***************************************************************************************
Chapter 21
Jarys

A shot clipped his pauldron, searing off a chunk of metal….He was too distracted to take this battle seriously.  He slammed into cover behind a dusty orange rock that flaked with the impact.  

Ever since the fight on Cygrat he couldn’t get the Jedi girl out of his head…the way she fought, the way she moved, the way she looked…the way she felt in the aether…in the heat of fight he hadn’t the time to critically reflect on these things…but now….

The rock thudded with the impact of more blaster bolts on the other side, it was just sedimentary, forged of compacted sand in the desert and wouldn’t hold up to much more.  He peeked over and fired a few shots then crouched into a run to the next cover point.  The mine was located at the base of a huge cliff made of sandstone that seemed to extend forever. Dotted around the base were the holes into the crust, watch towers and various prefabricated buildings in assorted states of disrepair.  

He clicked on his helmets am link brining up Selaena’s view of the battle field on his visor.   She was perched near the top of the cliff in a small alcove picking off the guards while Jarys and Meason hit them from the front.  In the link view he could see himself from above and the enemy guards as they move forward brining out what looked like missile launchers.

But it wasn’t just the Jedi girl…it was what Kassyndra had said...that he might have a child out there, somewhere…that Cilina or Shilea might be alive…He sensed the danger building…guided by the battle meld with Selaena, and the vision from her vantage point he put his rifle over the top of the rock and fired, hitting the crouching missile armed guard dead in the face.  Bolts from Maesons repeated littered the air to the left and the guard fled for cover, only to be picked off by shots from Selaena.

As they retreated he leapt the rock and ran forward, kicking up orange dust…could Cilina have somehow joined the Jedi…he threw a mental blast of aetheric energy forward to break apart a barricade of crates…from what he understood the Jedi sought ‘force’ sensitive children to enslave and brainwash…he pivoted aiming to the left as he ran to the right and fired precise grouped shots at the now exposed guards…but how then could he rescue his daughter, indeed was she still his daughter if she were not an Aethan culturally…

He absently lobbed  grenade guiding with the aether around the side of the watch tower then in behind the occupants…should he try and find her again….he skidded behind a prefab wall as the watch towers nest exploded with yellow heat…could he live with himself if he didn’t find out for sure….

A guard leapt down from the prefab, he sidestepped and caught him, flipped and used his momentum against him, slamming the guard into a cloud of orange dust which mingled with fresh blood as Jarys brought his knife down into the guard’s throat….

Kassyndra, but for her revelation he wouldn’t even suspect it…he strode around the prefab, noticing a few guard in the prefab office in front of him, he used the aether to bring the ceiling crumpling down upon them….if he had a daughter, if there was a young aethan woman out there perhaps they had a future…he strode toward the mine entrance indifferent to the bodies flopping dead from Selaenas green bolts around him…he had to find out, he had to know…a heavily armoured Ikotchi charged out at him…

Jarys broke free from his thoughts and ducked, shouldering the Ikotchi in the chest and sending him flying over his head with his own momentum, Jarys spun around and with a precise sweep planted his knife straight into the Ikotchis forehead….

He expanded his senses…hmm...it was over already.
**************************************************************************************
He sat in the shade of the cliff as the slaves wandered past, caked in the orange dirt of Santooine, their hands raw and bleeding from prying opals from the bedrock.  Most were weequay, a few twi’leks, no humans let alone Aethans it seemed.

They all trudged past toward the support ships to be ferried to the refugee centres….There were two large haulers, the medical teams going to and fro handing out nutrient pastes and water canisters.  All so predictable…he was eager to get out of here, get to Coruscant and see if he could find the Jedi girl.

After the fight with her he had learned what he could about the Jedi…their history, their code…their methods…it struck him how like the slavers they were…they took children away from their families, raised them to believe their utterly absurd doctrines, had them obey ridiculous rules - and for what, to prop up the very Republic that had enslaved and brainwashed them.  

It sickened him to think his own child might’ve been brainwashed like that…if it came down to it he wondered if he would have to kill a child raised in such an alien culture…such an affront to Aethan culture could not be permitted to live…yet based on how strong the Jedi girl he had faced was he wasn’t sure he could kill one.

As the last of the support ships was firing up engines to leave three smaller ships began to descend just outside the main camp.  He immediately sensed something was amiss.

He turned to Selaena who was absently checking over her rifle “Sel…get to your nest,”, he put on his helmet and flicked the comm

“Maes, bring the Vorynx in full speed,”  he sensed their acknowledgement in the aether immediately, Sel leaping with aeterhic speed to her snipers nest up the cliff.
**************************************************************************************



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Lord_S_Gray

Surik: "Kreia, what are you—are you a Jedi, a Sith?"
Kreia: "Does it matter? Of course it does, such titles allow you to break the galaxy into light and dark, categorize it. Perhaps I am neither, and I hold both as what they are, pieces of a whole."

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« Reply #85 on: January 25, 2018, 12:19:14 PM »

And here is the obverse position: Jedi--proclaming that they stand for "truth, justice, and peace"--taking, absconding, enslaving(?) children WITHOUT choice because they claim a moral imperative to do so...
This is exactly why the Jedi failed IMO.  And I think that LSG's writing regarding it SHOULD be canon!  Not only does it set the Galactic stage ensuring the dogmatic views of the Order, the rise of the Empire, and the Jedi Purge but it does so in a fashion that is organic and believeable!  And best/worst part is: Kimar believes in what he's doing, although I would not consider him a " well-intentioned extremist" either. 

Well LSG, you seem to have a knack for morally ambiguous characters... WELL written!

I wonder how Jayrys will feel about Milaea... This should be an EPIC and momentous occasion  Wink

And I think one of the reasons why we like Soryu so much: he's close to what the Jedi could have been...
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« Reply #86 on: January 25, 2018, 03:46:18 PM »

Don't give up on the Jedi quite yet.  We know Yoda ended up as Grand Master of the Order, and he was likely steering them back toward the Soryu ideal.  However, I have to admit that the concept of an order - ANY order - taking force-sensitive children by force and compelling them to be a part of that order is at its base evil.  So ... sithy of you, Jedi...  :-)

Actually reminds me of the PsiCorp from Babylon 5...  Inspiration?  ;-)  If not, you need to check that show out.  LSG, you would like it.  Its sooooo  not Star Trek or Star Wars, but still very awesome.  :-)

Jarys may soon meet Milaea.  I have this bad feeling that he's going to kill Soryu first, though...  Another tragic mistake.  As you said, LSG, these are flawed characters that make imperfect choices.  Very real indeed.  As a writer its to easy to imbue the 'hero' with insight or wisdom or even just blind luck that lets them make the right choice.  Its harder to write this kind of complex plot where EVERYONE is messing up.  I am very impressed and deeply honored that you've melded the Mak'Tor so deeply into it. 

Who knows?  Maybe in 600 years we can heal some of this hurt? 

Or not...  :-)
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« Reply #87 on: January 30, 2018, 12:45:34 AM »

Chapter 22
Soryu
They had sensed it from orbit over Santooine, the unrestrained…almost primal use of the force to kill.  They had followed the Sons support ships in, picking up their comms chatter, the slavers were dead, “Vorynx Squad” was on site….Vorynx…the word sounded familiar, something Valens had mentioned once perhaps.

They landed just outside the main camp, Gurrlum, the Cathar Master Hk’Tn and his Arkanian Padwan Feori and human Knight Beldan descended the ramp into the orange dust their ship had kicked up.  The Selonian Corana stayed in the faster of the three ships hovering above to provide air support he hoped wouldn’t be needed, the Bothan Hissana stayed in the second ship as back up for the ground force.

The last of the slave support ships had just left, he could sense three presences at the slave mine camp…agitated, tense…gone?  Gone?  It was as if they had vanished…he reached out again, Gurrlum grumbled, a sign of angst in his species.

“Master,” Feori said, “something feels…..” - Splurck

Soryu didn’t even have time to react in horror, he turned to look at Hk’Tn while drawing his sabre, he saw Hk’Tn;s face obscured by bone, blood and brain that had sprayed from the jagged stump that was once Feori’s head.  They all ignited their sabres…they hadn’t even sensed the danger, heard the shot, seen the blast…

Beldan suddenly moved, his sabres flashing and cracking as it caught something millimetres from his head, but the force of it was such that it pushed his sabre back into his face, searing his skin,

“Sniper,” yelled Gurrlum, they all went low and defensive, he opened himself…deep, deep into the currents…he could sense them now…the three weren’t in the camp together, one was still there, another up on the cliff, the third far away, but coming in rapidly, Corana sped toward the cliff in her ship to dislodge the sniper, he sensed Gurrlum begin a battle meditation.  Hk’Tn was slow to react, utterly in shock at the death of his apprentice right beside him. 

This was not going well.  And it was getting worse. 

Orange dust and deep red brown dirt beneath exploded up beside their ship, another other bolt struck it full in the side, unleashing a smell of burning metal and fried circuits. Coming in toward them was a ship unleashing blaster bolts.  Corana veered to intercept.  More rounds were fired by the Sniper, Soryu caught one of his blade aimed at his feet, it was a heavy blast…not just energy, these were some kind of energy coated projectile rounds.   

“Hissana, the sniper,” Gurrlum took control of the situation with his voice and his force presence  “Beldan, Hk’Tn go left to the cliffs to flank it, Soryu, you and I will tackle it head on,” 

Soryu didn’t know what ‘it’ was, till he turned and saw, it, a trail of blooms of orange dust speeding up toward them mid-way between their position and the camp where the remains of a rock pillar had long since collapsed in the desert winds.  From the rock stump came regular blaster fire, an armoured silhouette, and a presence in the force that felt beast like, unrestrained and lusting for blood.  He had never sensed anything like it before…his instincts, the very primal heart of him told him to run…it took an enormous amount of sheer will, even for a Jedi Master like Gurrlum and himself to charge toward it.

They poured out strength and support in the force to firm the others as they wavered against the visceral energy that repelled them. As the others flanked, stray bolts from the aerial combat above them slammed into the ground around them, spraying them rocks and dust. 

They fused their motions in a battle meld to deflect the bolts and sniper rounds as they approached.  Grenades came at them, but as soon as they tried to divert it the sender detonated them rather than risk them coming back at him, the explosions threw up ever more dust.   It seemed like a sand storm…but the explosions alone couldn’t account for this much dust…as he approached he sensed the swirling force, the armoured man was using the force to create a sand storm!

The sniper kept firing as if they were in clear view, not targeting with sight but the force. 

“Stay together,” Gurrlum called bringing them tighter into the battle meld, Soryu did what he could to add to the stability. 

They reached the rocky outcrop, he could sense the warrior…all around him…his presence in the force was like a lake he was in the middle of, it surrounded him, he couldn’t point to one part of it and say, here it is, he was subsumed.  He could see Gurrlum’s head swinging searching for the warrior as well

He could sense Beldan and Hk’Tn nearby, their flanking would not work if they couldn’t pin where he was…orange dust sprayed across their faces, he used the force to keep his vision as clear as possible.  He slipped deeper into the living force trying to pick up the core of where the warrior’s presence was coming from.  Beldan came into view, a heavy clash as he blocked another sniper round, then out of nowhere a gray armoured monster leapt onto his back from the storm, two blades plunging into then out of Beldan’s chest a trail of blood jetting out in response. 

He rushed forward launching a force grasp to try and catch or at least slow the warrior, Gurrlum’s long limbs surged forward in pursuit, but suddenly skidded to block another heavy shot from the sniper and the figure was lost to them.  Above them he could hear the thump-thump-thump of cannon fire as the ships fought. 

Finally he found a thread in the force…it was large yet…subtle…it was so much a part of the force as to be almost invisible…like trying to see a current under the ocean, everything just looked like water…it was a connection to the force that was deeply seated - like Valens and Milaea. 

He could trace the current in his mind…from the sniper, from the enemy pilot above…it was near…

“Hk’Tn” he yelled with his voice and his battle meld, the Cathar was 20 metres away just visible, he turned, his silver blade catching the dust as the armoured shadow flew at him from the side, he pivoted just in time to block the sword.  The fight between them was intense, they had already traded a dozen blows by the time he was half the distance, a Jedi Master matched blow for blow by…what was this warrior.  Soryu was metres away, he flipped up into the air to close the gap….

The wind was knocked out of him, his skin burnt as lightning struck him full on in the chest, he flopped downward managing to fall into a controlled roll landing. Gurrlum was closing fast as Soryu recovered, Hk’Tn….Hk’Tn was on his knees pushing against the warriors sword, his body crackling with lighting, Soryu launched a barrage of rocks at the Warrior as he rose, but they either bounced off his armour or were knocked aside by indifferent force defences. 

Soryu let the living force calm his frazzled neurons and speed his steps forward as the warrior suddenly pivoted and met Gurrlums blade before it could impale him from behind.  Hk’Tn sagged to the ground, a smoking charred ruin of a body covered by dying flickers of blue lightning.

***************************************************************************************************

Chapter 23
Jarys

War….war had been all he knew since being abducted from Aethas twenty years ago…the fight was all he knew…

More dust flicked into his face as he ducked out of the Jedi’s cut,

His first war was of survival in the Arena…he had become a beast to survive, and butchered his way out

He rose into a heavy punch to the Jedi’s thin frame, a wet cracking sounded from the Gado’s core as he used the pause to roll out of reach of his sabre.

The second war, the unending battles for the Sons…fighting the slavers who might have taken his people…across a hundred worlds, for years and years he had searched to find just three of them…one he had shown the final mercy to already.

The Jedi was not delayed, he could sense a healing aetheric energy already, he shot out mentally to disrupt it as he pulled his hold-out blaster and fired, it was pointless against a Jedi but bought him time and some knowledge of how the Jedi moved.

Now this third war…against the Jedi…he didn’t understand why they wanted him…was one person who used their ‘force’ and fought for someone else such a threat…he knew what he wanted from them though…he had to find the girl…

The second Jedi was gaining on him, he fired a surge of lighting in his direction, but he wouldn’t be fooled twice and caught it in his palm and on his blade, sending back a concentrated ball toward him.  He dived to avoid it and came up in a defensive stance..

He had lived in a constant state of war for so long…perhaps it was all he would ever know…to be facing two Jedi at once almost seemed a perfectly logical way to die…Every warrior dies alone he mused…perhaps this was the forgotten battlefield he would fall on…Selaena was distracted fending off the Jedi that had finally found her nest, Maeson wasn’t as good a pilot as a Jedi, but the Vorynx’s better shields and weapons made it an even fight…Jarys was truly alone. 

He countered and dodged the aetheric blasts sent at him as the masters came from both sides…he cut off his flow of aetheric power to the sand storm he had created, it was useless now they could track him.  The Gado worried him more than the human, they were thin, flexible and good gymnasts…but their organs situated across their limbs was a weakness.  He reached out to try and grasp at what organs he could, but this Gado was strong enough to block him…just.

He sprang at the Gado and launched a barrage of lighting at the human, to hold him back, the human could deal with it, but was clearly not used to it.  Their blades met in a furious storm of motion, the Gado using his flexibility to try and get around him, but Jarys was faster and more flexible than he anticipated – he was not a human like the Gado expected – he was an Aethan – stronger, faster, smarter. 

He could sense Selaena approaching, injured but victorious against the other Jedi.  Maeson above was getting the edge against the Jedi’s ship. 

The flurry continued, but the human had broken loose, he had to move fast, he dropped low as the Gado arced high and left, releasing his sword he put his hand to the ground and blanketed it with Aetherc fire, his sword he caught in his mind and hurled up to the Gado’s face, his flexibility let him parry it, but the fire he hadn’t anticipated and his feet were set ablaze, he could sense the humans shock behind him. 

The human was surging forward, Jarys pivoted to the side, raising his left hand that was streaming fire toward the human who caught it on his blade, the Gado was fumbling on injured feet to deflect Jarys’ mind controlled sword, he swapped his right hands flames for a crushing grip – the Gado used the force to defend himself from it…but he wasn’t aiming at the Gado…he imploded the churned the air behind the Gado, creating a high pressure zone that then puffed back out suddenly unbalancing the Gado further, Jarys flicked his tremor-knife to his hand and swiped rapidly into the Gado’s arm as he tumbled, the vibrational blade slicing cleanly though yielding a spray of gristle from the Gado’s elongated organs and cartridge-heavy, largely boneless body.

The human drew back out of the flames and rounded on him, the Gado started convulsing, trying to keep himself from falling, he brought his silver blade down toward Jarys, it seared through his right gauntlets armour and into his forearm before he could pull it away. 

His pain exploded into a shock wave that finally bowled the Gado over and pushed the human back in surprise, he retook his floating sword with his left hand and slashed it across both the Gado’s legs before he hit the ground, more gristle and fluids escaped as its elongated organs finally gave up from the trauma.

He rolled away from the dying creature, lest it try a last minute attack, only to come face to face with the human, his green sabre casting an eerie light against the orange dirt. 

He hit fast and hard, a merciless rampage of blows that Jarys struggled to counter, he used the aether as his second hand on his sword whilst firing off shots of lighting with his injured right…but this human was superior to his fellows, a slight delay in a parry saw him land a glancing blow on his left shoulder, through the armour and scorching the flesh, not disabling but painful. 

In the aether he was strong too…not as strong as the Jedi girl, but with Jarys already worn down, strong enough to match him…the human had him in physical combat…Jarys was just holding his own aetherically, and mentally this man was walking fortress that wasn’t worth probing.  He had little choice but to go all in.

As Selaena struggled to get in range to help, the dogfight came over head, the Vorynx looked to be smoking from one engine, the Jedi ship looked worse.  He drew out all the power he could, his skin flickered with energy, the Jedi was battering him down, a low cut he barely parried in time, his lighting was ineffective as the Jedi deflected it with his mind expertly.  He channelled his power not at the Jedi, but at the Jedi Ship…he felt Selaena and Maeson respond in their battle link, they all pulled at the hulking and machine and slammed it toward the ground. 

The Jedi sped up his attack with high blows as the ship came crashing down behind him.  Jarys braced in the aether as a tsumani of dirt came up behind the Jedi, who rolled out and into a defensive crouch, the tide broke around the Jedi’s invisible barrier as Jarys used every ounce of aetheric power he could muster to leap above it.  As he landed Maeson came in low overhead, the back draft scattering the burning metal shards of the Jedi ship toward him, he cruised over Sealena who leapt into the open boarding ramp.   

The Jedi rose from the hail of dirt and metal as Maeson pivoted around and opened fire on him, guided by the battle meld.  The Jedi dodged and wove with startling speed to avoid the rapid cannon fire that threw up ever more dirt and rock.  Jarys surged to take him from behind but as he came into range to start firing lightning the Jedi turned and battered him back with an aether push, he recovered with a roll and rose to see the Jedi slashing down at him, he pivoted out but the blow ripped into his back through his armour…the third time it had saved him today…he kicked out and hit the Jedi’s shin the bone audibly snapping, then rose into an upper cut faster than the Jedi could dodge smashing into the Jedi’s sternum, in response Jarys was hit with another aetheric blast knocked the wind from his chest. 

He stumbled back as Maeson approached…he had sensed this before…the Jedi was burning in the aether…his skin was starting to flicker into incandescent white…if he pushed this Jedi any further he might enter a fusion state, turning his body into pure energy…as his grandfather had done in the war that had started this all… it would kill the Jedi for certain, but it would likely be too much even for him to survive…he had to get out of here, he surged what he could into a tempest of lightning as Maeson came over head, cutting off only to leap up to the ramp, but the Jedi was behind him on the ramp!

He thought that was it till Selaena crouched ahead fired a stream of lighting one handed forcing the Jedi on the defensive as sparks flew off into the wind as the ship sped away from the battleground.

Jarys added his own lighting and moved in to attack, the Jedi was hard pressed against the two, but such was his skill he managed to perform swift turn into a crouching sweep kick causing Jarys to stumble letting the Jedi land a pommel blow on his head. 

His world going red and black he righted himself and just flung both his fists forward…it was clumsy, almost purely a reflex, but so unexpected that combined with Selaena’s stream it caught the Jedi off guard and slammed into his ribs, an audible crack resonated in Jarys blood beating ears as the Jedi toppled off the ramp and into the orange dunes below. 
***************************************************************************************************

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Lord_S_Gray

Surik: "Kreia, what are you—are you a Jedi, a Sith?"
Kreia: "Does it matter? Of course it does, such titles allow you to break the galaxy into light and dark, categorize it. Perhaps I am neither, and I hold both as what they are, pieces of a whole."

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« Reply #88 on: January 30, 2018, 02:43:34 AM »

Wow...

Hmm.  I wonder if Kimar will send Valens and Milaea after these guys next.  Hmm....

But Soryu...  He is stronger than I thought he'd be.  Holding his own against three Aethans.  Well, sort of.  :-)  Still, nicely written.  And Jarys' exposition on War...  A great look into his mind.  Nicely done.
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TheDutchman
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« Reply #89 on: January 30, 2018, 04:24:47 PM »

I LOVE seeing Soryu kicking rear and taking names!  But...the rest of the Jedi; poor souls...

Jarys is another great example of an ambiguous character: he's not a villain but neither is he a hero.  Still, after 20 years of looking for his fellow Aethans...I can see why he'd be despondent.

Oh, best line of the chapter: “Master,” Feori said, “something feels…..” - Splurck

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My sabers:Zearic's Aldrnari, Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, AS; Zearic's shoto, Apprentice v4 w/Obsidian, AS; Graflex SE w/Obsidian, GB; Archon v3 (modded w/ activation box) w/Obsidian, CG; Dark Sentinel v4 w/Obsidian, BR; Sentinel LE v4 w/Obsidian, GB; Initiate v5 w/Obsidian, AS; Sentinel LE v4 stunt, EG; Aeon LE v4 stunt, FO; Dominix v4 stunt, BR; Aeon v3 stunt, SY

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