Venting.

[ed_ification]

That's just the animal cruelty charge, however.  Folks who believe that they lost a pet to this sicko could take the case through civil court and just wreck him financially.

[ThreadJack]

@TJ, He is a little bit of the neighborhood vigilante.  He likes to do the "I have my rights under the Constitution" bit whenever anyone from the enforcement committee pays him a visit yet he is the first to make a stink about how others need to obey the rules when it suits his purposes.  There were complaints about some dogs barking at 3 a.m. about three years back that came missing.  Then there was the issue with a guy keeping poisonous snakes in his garage.  One gets out and it is found shot on the side of the road.  Not a bad thing overall but it was done in the middle of the neighborhood and no one heard or saw anything at the time.  A man recently adopted three river otters and was keeping them as pets and two mysterious died by being "run over" perfectly in the middle like they were lain in from of a set of tires.  When our local animal wildlife professor ask to take a closer look, he found that they had been shot.  If I had to guess, revenge and self righteousness honestly.  In all of the above named incidents, he was the one screaming loudest that something needed to be done to them.

In my experience the people who hide behind the Constitution, and play that card often, are always the ones that A) Actually know very little about the Constitution, and B) Think it applies only to them, and are the first to advocate taking other's rights away.

He sounds like a real winner to me....

[Master Bluespike74]

I want to take this time before I head to work to thank everyone for their support.  I really thought I was going to have the Karma card flipped on me for taking so much joy in seeing the neighborhood turn on him with so much ferocity.  Glad to see that I am not alone in my thinking and that many of you feel the same.  Have a great week, stay safe, and happy sabering.

Blue

[RogueLeader]

Honestly Blue, I'm happy for you.

[Darth Abaddon]

My grandfather is on his way out of that door. He's been fighting cancer since the summer. He is a tough man but it's a fight he is about to lose. We don't expect him to make it through the night. I'm filled with all sorts of emotions right now, mostly frustration. I'm frustrated because I have NO idea how to deal with this. The last person I lost was my uncle quite a few years ago. I didn't know how to deal with it then either. I was just a stone. I idolize my grandfather. He's the kinda guy who would stop on the side of the road on his way to church to help you change a tire and never accept anything in return. He taught me lessons all through my life. My parents raised me just fine, it's just that I always had that special connection with him that I've never had and never will have with anyone else. He was always firm but fair to all of us. To be honest I don't know what I'm going to do without him. I know he doesn't want me to feel sad about this but I can't help it. I went to see him on Sunday. He recognized me and everything, but because of the medications his mind was all over. I tried my best to look strong for my grandmother and my sister but it was just a punch in the head to see him like that. He fell down the steps and punctured a lung, all he did was laugh about it in the hospital, that's how strong mentally and physically he was. Now he isn't even all there anymore. If you ever met him, you would see what I'm saying. He doesn't deserve to go this way. To be quite honest it pisses me off. I'll probably go to the range tomorrow to ease myself but I can't go to the range every day. I just don't know what to do. I'm not asking for any "I'm sorry to hear that." or anything like that. I'm asking for suggestions on how to deal with this. We're going to have a service and his ashes are going to be spread on the farm.

[ed_ification]

My grandfather is on his way out of that door. He's been fighting cancer since the summer. He is a tough man but it's a fight he is about to lose. We don't expect him to make it through the night. I'm filled with all sorts of emotions right now, mostly frustration. I'm frustrated because I have NO idea how to deal with this. The last person I lost was my uncle quite a few years ago. I didn't know how to deal with it then either. I was just a stone. I idolize my grandfather. He's the kinda guy who would stop on the side of the road on his way to church to help you change a tire and never accept anything in return. He taught me lessons all through my life. My parents raised me just fine, it's just that I always had that special connection with him that I've never had and never will have with anyone else. He was always firm but fair to all of us. To be honest I don't know what I'm going to do without him. I know he doesn't want me to feel sad about this but I can't help it. I went to see him on Sunday. He recognized me and everything, but because of the medications his mind was all over. I tried my best to look strong for my grandmother and my sister but it was just a punch in the head to see him like that. He fell down the steps and punctured a lung, all he did was laugh about it in the hospital, that's how strong mentally and physically he was. Now he isn't even all there anymore. If you ever met him, you would see what I'm saying. He doesn't deserve to go this way. To be quite honest it pisses me off. I'll probably go to the range tomorrow to ease myself but I can't go to the range every day. I just don't know what to do. I'm not asking for any "I'm sorry to hear that." or anything like that. I'm asking for suggestions on how to deal with this. We're going to have a service and his ashes are going to be spread on the farm.

This reminds me of my wife's grandfather, who passed as a result of asbestosis.  He went out much the same way.

I didn't know him as well as my wife, of course; but I'd heard many stories about him from her.  Stories about his charity, his stability, his quiet stoicism and bearing of loads that, frankly, I don't know that younger people can bear.  Seeing him in the hospital bed at the end was immensely tough.  I bore it because I had to - this was simply a person I knew.  He mattered of course, because he was important to my wife.  To my wife - this was a figure who had lived next door to her for her whole life that she would not be able to see again.

It is difficult to see a person that you idolize as vulnerable.

My best advice is this:  Is your grandfather the sort of man who would want you to mourn what he has become in his disease, or is the sort of man who would want you to celebrate him for the whole of who he is?  I would bet the latter.

Will that celebration come immediately?  Absolutely not.  Nor should it.  Grief is a natural thing, and each of us must come to it and pass through it in our own way.

I have heard it said that funerals are not for the dead; they are for the living.  They are a way for us to express that sense of loss.

Talk to whom you must.  Take solace where you can.  Cry as you need.  Ultimately, celebrate your grandfather - his life, his wisdom, all that he was to you, and all that he might yet be.

[Darth Kitsune]

I just want to put this here because of the style of this topic:

I have spent a little over the month being grounded by my obscure family. Yes, grounded. At the age of 21. I have not been permitted to use my things for personal amusement or practicality aside from schooling in college (as in my laptop/computer). Unfortunately these are things that I rely heavily on my life in, and though I could do without this material things, my career and social contacts are pretty much confined to these machines. Most of my friends, both long distance and people I personally know can only be reached through these machines by me. Outside of a few minutes at college of brief socialization which is quickly consumed by my classwork, I have had little to no social contact at all. There are friends I have not spoken with for about a month that I cherish deeply, yet I have no idea what is going on in their lives, or even if they are okay.

I have seen that the forums I co-administrate have fallen into a state of desolation, where all if not many of the members have left. I worked hard for the jobs I hold there, as a forum administrator of a website many people used to go on and talk about hobbies and daily matters on an average basis. In fact, it took me five years of dedication and leadership to work towards this unpaying yet satisfactory job in these communities. They are now gone, because I have not been able to maintain my duty as a resourceful and active administrator. I feel as if I have let these people down, let alone myself because of the work it took to get these jobs.

I have run out of things to do that entertain me. I look at my limited quanitity of hobbies due to my overbearing family life. I have done everything I can to occupy myself in these confined quarters. And it is driving me up the walls. The only thing I can do to keep me entertained is swamp myself with my college work, and of course that stress alone cannot sustain one for very long in a postive manner; especially since work is piling on more and more as the semester ticks down to Spring Break, which will soon enough tick down to finals. My games bore me. My television? I never watch Television. Nothing interests me on it anymore because, admitted by most people I know, television sucks (of which I wholeheartedly agree). My art? I do enough of it as it is through college, so there is little time to spend on personal art at the moment (not to mention a relative lack of supplies due to funding).

My family is driving me insane. Well, rather, mad. Insane would be the wrong term hence its definition. Many people would hark on me, calling out how I complain so much about them. They gave me life, education, money. You know, the works. But, what I would do to trade that all away for a normal family. Yes I realize families have their fights, arguments, and quarrels. But my family, it's sickening. For how normal "we" seem, it is nothing but a mask to show off to the world how "normal" they want to appear. Through this month of absence I have meditated on my personal life, focusing on my family alone. I always question myself, and my motives. Why do I feel this way about them? Then when I am not distracted by my petty machinery and hobbies, I can see why. I am bullied, pushed around, and blatantly humiliated by them. I am made into the enemy because of the general, "why not?" And I am gradually growing more sick of it each day that passes. Each month. Each year. At the age of twenty-one, I should have far more repect than I recieve from my family. Yes, I do not currently hold a job. Yes, I am not perfect. Yes, I made mistakes in my youth. But there is no reason to hold these things against me for all of eternity. I work hard, as hard as I can, and balance what I can when I can balance it. No matter how hard I work, it is never good enough. I am always, "irresponsible, stupid, ignorant, arrogant, naive, lazy, etc". Many words have gone through my ears to describe how worthless I apparently am to my family. All of this comes from my grandmother, who constantly picks and scratches at old wounds and things just to make them into sins of my existance (at least by practicallity it seems). My mother? She never stands up for me. She's gotten tired of it, but defaulted to my grandmother's side just because grandmother happens to rule over the family with an iron fist. I am constantly controlled, manipulated because I have no other choice. People tell me to move, to report it, to do something about it. But it isn't that simple. To simply answer this, it is a war of attrition. If I lose, I live out on the street and die. If I win, it is because I held out for the time I've spent with them.

But this is grating. Grating on my nerves, on my patience. I am patient, but there are limits. I am tired of my things being taken from me. I am tired of being bullied by my family. I am tired of appearing worthless. It needs to end. And at this point in my life, I am going to push harder than ever. My family will learn that one day, because of all of this, they pushed me as far away as they possibly can. I will win. I will continue to fight this. I am sick of being emotionally abused.

[Master Bluespike74]

@Kitsune:  I am hearing and feeling you at the same time.  I have been there and it does grate on your nerves and will eventually turn you into the biggest cynic.  I'll do my very best to help you through this before you become 38 and finally realize what you have missed.  To disarm your opponent, sometimes you have to go with them.  If they punch forward, you learn away in the opposite direction.  When you are called lazy, just say "Yes I am" and wait for the next insult.  Before long, you realize that all your grandmother and family are throwing at you are just words.  Look up George Carlin and the seven words on youtube.  It was a comedy routine but his comments about words are what brought me to the point that I can now pretty much endure a plethora of insults will very little concern. 

Everyone makes mistakes and unless you have been given a life sentence, the punishment cannot last (or should it last) forever.  I have been exactly where you are and I still clash with some family members to this day.  What I can say is that when I became a father, I knew what my daughter should not be exposed to on a daily basis and I have made many efforts to prevent that from happening.  This experience will make you a great leader one day.  It sux big time to be going through it now but when you have that "black belt" of surviving insults in your arsenal, you will be a resource to help others along the way.

We are here for you.  One last thought:  Jobs don't describe you as a person.  Only you can do that.

Blue

[TheHobbitofDune]

Well, finals week is coming up, and the good news is that I'll definitely be able to pass Math and English if I continue to fight for it, but Japanese is a lost cause, and there is no way I can make it. My mid-term grade came up to about a C, and I still have a homework assignment that I haven't done yet, and I haven't had any time to work on the final exam assignment either, so I'm essentially screwed. Unfortunately, I completely missed the withdraw date, so I'll have to go on, but I'm probably just going to stop early and spend my time focusing on getting the best grades possible in Math and English, without even bothering with Japanese anymore.

I'm planning on talking with a counselor this coming week, as well as an academic advisor. I'll explain to them that I have aspergers and that the majority of the classes I took in high school were special education classes, so I was extremely unprepared for the insanity of college, which is definitely the truth. I was in way over my head here. Hopefully I can find some way to get a pass, but if I don't, then I can at least say that I tried my best and did everything I possibly could before failing. That's what counts, IMO. And yes, I know, it can be argued that I haven't done everything since I'm planning on giving up early, but honestly, I'm technically failing my math class, as well, and my English grade is kind of on a slippery slope, and the last thing I need is for one doomed class to take up my time and drag me down even further. It's better to just fail one class than to fail all three.

The tough part will be explaining this to my parents, but I'm sure they'll understand. I'll be sure to tell them that I'll try harder next term, especially since this term has really trained me to not only manage my time better, but also to utilize all of the resources at my disposal. I'm still going to get lectured, but that just means that they care, and I'm used to it....

*takes deep breath* Thanks for letting me vent. I just had to get all of that off my chest before I start studying, because otherwise I'll be thinking about it constantly, and I won't be focused as a result.

[Master Bluespike74]

During the lecture you are going to receive, remind them that it was better to fail only one class than all three.  Sometimes the best generals have to know which battles can be won and which ones are a lost cause.  General Custer thought he could win them all and died as a result at Little Big Horn.  If he had let his quarry go, he might have lived long enough to actually try to run for President.  Best of luck to you on Math and English. 

[ThreadJack]

Well, finals week is coming up, and the good news is that I'll definitely be able to pass Math and English if I continue to fight for it, but Japanese is a lost cause, and there is no way I can make it. My mid-term grade came up to about a C, and I still have a homework assignment that I haven't done yet, and I haven't had any time to work on the final exam assignment either, so I'm essentially screwed. Unfortunately, I completely missed the withdraw date, so I'll have to go on, but I'm probably just going to stop early and spend my time focusing on getting the best grades possible in Math and English, without even bothering with Japanese anymore.

I'm planning on talking with a counselor this coming week, as well as an academic advisor. I'll explain to them that I have aspergers and that the majority of the classes I took in high school were special education classes, so I was extremely unprepared for the insanity of college, which is definitely the truth. I was in way over my head here. Hopefully I can find some way to get a pass, but if I don't, then I can at least say that I tried my best and did everything I possibly could before failing. That's what counts, IMO. And yes, I know, it can be argued that I haven't done everything since I'm planning on giving up early, but honestly, I'm technically failing my math class, as well, and my English grade is kind of on a slippery slope, and the last thing I need is for one doomed class to take up my time and drag me down even further. It's better to just fail one class than to fail all three.

The tough part will be explaining this to my parents, but I'm sure they'll understand. I'll be sure to tell them that I'll try harder next term, especially since this term has really trained me to not only manage my time better, but also to utilize all of the resources at my disposal. I'm still going to get lectured, but that just means that they care, and I'm used to it....

*takes deep breath* Thanks for letting me vent. I just had to get all of that off my chest before I start studying, because otherwise I'll be thinking about it constantly, and I won't be focused as a result.

Just remind them, you gotta do what you gotta do. Sometimes it's a lost cause, and admitting that is part of being an adult.

The battle is lost, giving up is the best option. At the Battle of Gettysburg, General Lee knew when to quit. After Pickett's Charge had failed miserably, he knew it was better to leave now rather than lose more men in a battle that could not be won. Even though his men wanted to charge again, he would not send them to a needless death. He simply pulled out and went on to fight another day.

[TheHobbitofDune]

Thanks, guys. That really helps to put things into perspective for me. I don't feel nearly as nervous about telling my parents It actually is better that I fail, because I don't really understand the things that I am taught during class, so now I can just take it again and hopefully get a better understanding. I don't want to give up on learning Japanese, despite how badly I screwed up this time around.

[ed_ification]

I would bring up that rather than dwell on the one class and cause yourself to fail all 3, you realized where your efforts were best spent.

Perhaps another way of learning Japanese might benefit you?  Rosetta Stone, or something similar, while you get yourself fully readied for what college expects of you?

[Darth Severus]

I know you've already taken Japanese, an most likely need a foriegn language to graduate, I'd recommend taking spanish or German it you are struggling that much with it. I took German in highschool and desided to change it up with Chinese in college and Chinese was so much harder, luckily for my GPA I had a new professor trying to get more people into the program so the grading was rather lax.

[TheHobbitofDune]

Well, I still need a few more credits to fill in the requirement, and they need to be from a second language course. The reason why I was struggling so much with Japanese was definitely because it is a difficult language to learn, but also because I'm horrible at time management, and I never got much time to work on it. I'm sure if I had more time I could pass the class. I'm thinking that maybe I could take only two classes for one of my next few terms, to lighten the workload and put an emphasis on Japanese.

But then again, you guys are probably right. Spanish would definitely be much easier, and I could then learn Japanese on my own and focus on college instead. The thing is, is that I want to one day visit Japan, and maybe even move there. Well, my grandpa would probably kill me since we are Chinese, and you know how that goes.... But yeah, I'll think about it carefully.

Anyway, I'm going to let my dad know that I'm going to fail Japanese. Wish me luck.