Venting.

[Master Lucien Kane]

Broke up with my potential girlfriend today. I feel awful because of it. It was sort of both of our faults. I was loosing patience for something and she wasn't moving forward from something, so I was kind of stuck standing still in the relationship and couldn't go anywhere with it.

After a while it kind of put distance between us, and eventually I just couldn't keep standing still. I have a life to live, places to go, people to see. I felt like I was being held back.

So I broke it off. Of course, as I tell her she was went into shock and told me that she was going to tell me that she solved the problem but of course it was too late by now.

But knowing I broke somebody's heart destroys me on the inside. I was always the one getting hurt when I was younger, but this time around I had to put an end to something that just wasn't working. And either way, I still feel awful.

Especially now because I'm afraid of how she will react. I'm not a bad guy, and most everyone will tell you that. I even let her down respectfully. However, I fear that I may become the enemy now, or that people will view me differently. And I'm afraid, knowing her, she will overreact in the worst ways. I kind of helped pull her out of a rut, and she might fall back into it. Not drugs or anything, but she's a danger to herself.

So....yeah.

I'm sorry about that, I had a similar issue with a past girlfriend, when I broke up with her, she started threatening to kill herself. She didn't realize what that did to me, I suffered insomnia, eating issues, a whole laundry list of stuff that took me a long time to sort through.

What I learned was is this, you're responsible for you, unless you're married. Then you're responsible for your family. I tried my best to help her through it, but let's be honest. What is better? Breaking up and going our separate ways, or lying to her and leading her on in a relationship that you aren't really invested in?

All in all, if you were nice about it, and keep being kind, you'll still be friends. Breakups suck, no matter how good the conditions.

If she is threatening suicide, tell her you're going to call her family and inform them of the situation. Immediately. If for whatever reason the family isn't going to do anything about it, call a suicide prevention hotline, they might be able to help you talk to her, or get her the help she needs.

Do everything you can to help her without wrecking your own life, and without going back to her. Sounds to me like you did everything right, and I'd be willing to bet you two remain friends.

[Darth Kitsune]

Thanks. That really means a lot.

[Master Lucien Kane]

Thanks. That really means a lot.

I try to refrain from giving too much advice when people are venting... Generally if I'm going through a rough patch, I HATE it when someone tries to impart some profound wisdom upon me. Unless someone directly asks I try not to do it.

However I've had some first hand experience in this area, and I can tell you are bumming yourself out wondering if you did the right thing.

[TheHobbitofDune]

I try to refrain from giving too much advice when people are venting... Generally if I'm going through a rough patch, I HATE it when someone tries to impart some profound wisdom upon me. Unless someone directly asks I try not to do it.

See, that's my problem. Whenever I vent, I tend to want advice, and when others vent, I tend to give advice back. Then when they get upset at me, I get upset too But of course, this is the internet, and it's hard to figure out what emotions the person on the other side has. It's so much easier outside of the internet. *shrugs*

[Kresnik]

See, that's my problem. Whenever I vent, I tend to want advice, and when others vent, I tend to give advice back. Then when they get upset at me, I get upset too But of course, this is the internet, and it's hard to figure out what emotions the person on the other side has. It's so much easier outside of the internet. *shrugs*

Venting is suppose to be just that ... Opening it up and letting it all out but no inspecting anything to go back in. The vent is opened one way etc ...


But on the topic of former significant others suggesting suicide.  Definitely notify a parent or relative and just tell the person to call a suicide hotline etc.

I had one that starved herself she lost like 20 lbs and she had only weighed 105 lbs so it was a mess but eventually she got help.

Most of the time it's nothing more than a guilt trip sometimes they are seriously mentally ill and need medical help. Other than that you have no responsibility ... Just realize that that is the person you would have had to deal with when things went sour in any avenue of your relationship.

[TheHobbitofDune]

You know that old movie about the police officer that got turned into a robot? My dad let me watch it when I was younger and it left me emotionally traumatized. It's also the reason why I have a phobia of prosthetics. Well I opened up to my friend about it because he said he wouldn't judge me. What does he do? He goes and starts sending me pictures of him (the officer) even though he knows that'll just freak me out, and then he laughs about it and tells me to lighten up....... I'm so upset right now.

[B1ondeange1]

internet hugs

and tell your friend to stop being such an ass

[TheHobbitofDune]

internet hugs

and tell your friend to stop being such an ass

*hugs back* Thank you. And I did.

[Prowl 1701]

You know that old movie about the police officer that got turned into a robot? My dad let me watch it when I was younger and it left me emotionally traumatized. It's also the reason why I have a phobia of prosthetics. Well I opened up to my friend about it because he said he wouldn't judge me. What does he do? He goes and starts sending me pictures of him (the officer) even though he knows that'll just freak me out, and then he laughs about it and tells me to lighten up....... I'm so upset right now.

Robocop?  They are doing a remake of that movie. Sorry to hear that it affected you on such a profound level though.  Tell your friend that he needs to look up "friendship" in a dictionary.

[TheHobbitofDune]

Robocop?  They are doing a remake of that movie. Sorry to hear that it affected you on such a profound level though.  Tell your friend that he needs to look up "friendship" in a dictionary.

I was trying to avoid saying the name, but yes, that. And to be honest, I'm really not looking forward to people talking about the remake when it comes out. I know my worries sound pretty ridiculous. I should just see a professional about it....

[Prowl 1701]

I was trying to avoid saying the name, but yes, that. And to be honest, I'm really not looking forward to people talking about the remake when it comes out. I know my worries sound pretty ridiculous. I should just see a professional about it....

Sorry about saying the name, I should have thought about that.  Don't worry, everybody has something they are afraid of, I have a terrible fear of heights, I get sick on top of 12 foot ladders.  Everybody fears something, except maybe Hal Jordan.

As for that movie, the new one will probably suck, the last movie certainly did (RC3).

[Deadcow]

I'm scared of storms, which is weird because I live in southern IL and we have them all the time. I'm not even scared of the thunder and lightning. I'm scared of the wind at night. I don't know why. It's getting better though, as a kid I would throw up during storms at night.

[RogueLeader]

I'm scared of storms, which is weird because I live in southern IL and we have them all the time. I'm not even scared of the thunder and lightning. I'm scared of the wind at night. I don't know why. It's getting better though, as a kid I would throw up during storms at night.

I'm scared of storms too, and I used to live in Kansas.

[TheHobbitofDune]

Sorry about saying the name, I should have thought about that.  Don't worry, everybody has something they are afraid of, I have a terrible fear of heights, I get sick on top of 12 foot ladders.  Everybody fears something, except maybe Hal Jordan.

As for that movie, the new one will probably suck, the last movie certainly did (RC3).

It's okay. I'm afraid of heights too. Not when I'm on a plane though. But I do have a rough time going down stairs, for example.

Well, either way, I'm going to stay very far away from it.

[ThreadJack]

I'm scared of Bob Saget.